I'm not a comedian
- Reads 168
- Votes 3
- Parts 23
Ongoing<5 mins
Last published Sun, Oct 2, 2022
just things I find in my day to day that are funny.
Please don't take any of this seriously. There are a lot of jokes in bad taste, or with slightly mature topics. If it's not your cup of coffee, you can just not read it.
(Art work, photos, quotes, stories aren't mine unless stated otherwise (the pictures are mostly taken by me tho))
All Rights Reserved
#38
badchoices
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
Anime one shots *lemon included* ;)
previously: Assassination Classroom ||one shots|| （2019）Starting fresh! I'm finally writing again after 5 years. I edited my first story, and I would like to write some new ones. So go ahead and leave a request on the first page! （2024）can't believe I'm back after another five years LOLLL I will keep the old stories as they are, even tho they cringe asf ANYWAYS, please check out my new stories!! Thanks for supporting! I accept: fluff, lemon, smut, crack and more!!! Feel free to add to the list!Complete
Trust Me // Zach Herron
<completed> Well..... READ IT LIMELIGHTS!!! <contains cursing> Update: I was really young when I wrote this so the grammar is gonna be bad, Im working on it don't come at me!! Im sorryyy. ← Rankings → #504 whydontwe #158 whydontwe #81 whydontwe #167 zachherron #62 zachherron #1 zachherron {I'm crying!}Complete
IT & ST Imagines & Preferences
i wrote this when i was 13 so i'm sorry for how bad it is but a lot of people seem to enjoy it so i'm leaving it up, just know i am self aware xComplete
𝐇𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐆𝐨𝐣𝐨 || 𝐉𝐉𝐊
↳ ❝ [ 𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮; 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐫 𝐞𝐱𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 ] ¡! ❞ all families keep secrets; but only this one can hold it for eleven years. - ͙۪۪̥˚ ❛ 𝘏𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘱𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘦𝘺𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘚𝘪𝘹 𝘌𝘺𝘦𝘴. 𝘏𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘸𝘰. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘴𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘨𝘺. ❜ ˚͙۪۪̥◌ ▃▃▃▃ 𝙒𝘼𝙍𝙉𝙄𝙉𝙂𝙎 : gore, extreme/torturous violence, trauma, sexual scenes, alcohol, heavy angst, fluff, etc. 𝙈𝘼𝙉𝙂𝘼 𝙎𝙋𝙊𝙄𝙇𝙀𝙍𝙎 ! [geto suguru x oc ]Complete
Shall We Talk? (You don't have a say in the matter)
I'm just going to fill this with rants, talking, and stuff I hope will make you laugh. (there might be some stupid stuff in here, sorry) (not updating)Complete![𝐌𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚'𝐬 𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 [𝐒𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐚; 𝐌𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚 𝐀𝐔]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/278902688-256-k488685.jpg)
𝐌𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚'𝐬 𝐇𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝 [𝐒𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐚; 𝐌𝐚𝐟𝐢𝐚 𝐀𝐔]
𝐒𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐋 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐅𝐈𝐀'𝐒 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃 . . . . . 𝐒𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐮 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐞𝐦𝐢 𝐄𝐢𝐭𝐚 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐩𝐚 𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝, 𝐄𝐢𝐭𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐥𝐞𝐞 𝐈𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐮 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦'𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐲. 𝐅𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦. 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐯𝐞? 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭.Complete
𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 || 𝟏𝟖+
𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐁𝐞𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐜𝐞́'𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐚𝐧, 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨-𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐎𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐚 𝐌𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐣. 𝐓𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫, 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐚𝐥, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐮𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠... 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐬: 𝐖𝐡𝐨'𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥? "𝐊𝐢𝐝𝐧𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐥? 𝐒𝐨 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐚𝐱 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐮𝐝, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐡."
𝓣𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓱 𝕭𝖔𝖔𝖐 1
DISCONTINUED!! Tokyo Revengers x Dom/Seme Male Reader Mikey x Male Reader ᴍ/ɴ, ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴀɴ ᴀᴠᴇʀᴀɢᴇ 16 ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴏʟᴅ ɢᴜʏ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴀꜱɴ'ᴛ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴀ ɢᴀɴɢ. ʜᴇ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏꜱ ʟɪᴋᴇᴅ ꜰɪɢʜᴛɪɴɢ ʙʏ ʜɪᴍꜱᴇʟꜰ. ʜᴇ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴋɴᴏᴡɴ ᴀʀᴏᴜɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ʙᴇᴀᴛɪɴɢ ᴍᴜʟᴛɪᴘʟᴇ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜᴏᴜᴛ ᴀ ɢᴀɴɢ ᴡʜɪᴄʜ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ꜰᴇᴀʀ ʜɪᴍ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋꜱ ʟɪᴋᴇ. ᴏɴʟʏ ʀᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ɪᴛꜱ "ʜɪᴍ" ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ᴡᴇᴀʀꜱ ᴀ ᴍᴀꜱᴋ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀ ʜᴏᴏᴅɪᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀ ᴅᴇᴠɪʟ ʜᴏʀɴꜱ ᴏɴ ɪᴛ. ᴜɴᴛɪʟ ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ꜰᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴏ ʜᴇ ɪꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴏɴ'ᴛ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ʜɪᴍ ᴀʟᴏɴᴇ.. If you're here to fedisized mlm, leave. DNI ꜱᴛᴀʀᴛᴇᴅ: 11/7/21 ᴇɴᴅᴇᴅ: - 5/17/22 ᴍᴇɴᴛɪᴏɴꜱ ᴏꜰ: ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ ᴜꜱᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴋɴɪꜰᴇꜱ/ɢᴜɴꜱ ʙʟ ꜱᴜɪᴄɪᴅᴇ ᴅʀᴜɢꜱ ᴅʀɪɴᴋɪɴɢ ꜱᴇxᴜᴀʟ? ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ -ɪ'ʟʟ ᴀᴅᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ɪꜰ ɪ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏᴏ-Complete
poetry
trigger warning. dont expect you to read this, words are simply that. just words. but if you do i hope you enjoy 👍 and if you relate to any of these, im so sorry. (all of these are original and written by me unless its said otherwise) might also include random rambles and/or thoughts or maybe even quotes (sorry again abt this)
The Crime Crypt
Join us as we dig deep into the sick, twisted, true crime stories! Some popular and some you have never heard of! If you are squeamish, easily repulsed, not that hard of a stomach, etc. I'd advise you to turn away now. ⚠️TRIGGER WARNINGS⚠️ •Murder •Rape •Suicide •Abuse •Drugs 🔞These stories are not meant for children under the age of 18. Parental discretion is advised🔞 IF YOU GUYS ENJOY THE STORY PLEASE: •Comment •Share •Vote Vote VOTE •Follow 🥉-truecrime (09/17/2021) 🥇-truecrime (9/22/2021) 🥈-truecrime (9/23/2021) #7 truecrime (1/13/22) #6 truecrime (1/12/22) #6 truecrime (1/14/22) #5 truecrime (1/7/22) #5 truecrime (1/12/22) #4 truecrime (1/10/22)Complete
previously: Assassination Classroom ||one shots|| （2019）Starting fresh! I'm finally writing again after 5 years. I edited my first story, and I would like to write some new ones. So go ahead and leave a request on the first page! （2024）can't believe I'm back after another five years LOLLL I will keep the old stories as they are, even tho they cringe asf ANYWAYS, please check out my new stories!! Thanks for supporting! I accept: fluff, lemon, smut, crack and more!!! Feel free to add to the list!
More detailsContent Guidelines