Loss and Love

Loss and Love

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WpMetadataReadMatureOngoing35m
WpMetadataNoticeLast published Mon, Jan 2, 2023
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Fiction
Romance
We are never taught the proper way to feel at a funeral. I mean you have your criers, the ones who are sad but won't show it, and then the randos that just show up to pay their respects. I on the other hand feel nothing. I am sitting front row starring at my brothers corpse laying in the stupid casket and I feel, nothing. I am not sad, I am not angry, I am just empty. I finally break my eyes away from him to look around the room, Leigh walked in, her eyes red and puffy. She looked like shit, I mean at least clean up a little, I did. Her mother spotted me first, I received a small smile from her, the gesture saying so much. I always loved Leighs mother, she was sweet and sometimes a nut, but she was an amazing person, and mother. Leighs sister was no where to be seen, which didn't bother me as much. She walked over to the casket as her mother made her way to her seat. --- AU of "Sorry For Your Loss", just because I wanted it to be gay. <3
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***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences*** In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.

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