Eighteen Years To An End

𝗡𝗼𝘁𝗲:
• Statements in slashes indicate Giva's self talks.
e.g / -𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚎𝚡𝚝- /
• It is what it is.

Eighteen Years To an End.

A mind filled exclusively with dark thoughts. The ones that would entirely change one's personality if only they take over, once you have had your lot...Something so menacing that even death cant resist not having you.

Unusually, have you pondered over how it would be, if someone would've wanted to stop existing on their birthday?

Giva, her 18th birthday is a day close and her wish is to be gone- disappear into the end or the beginning of something new.

But why is it so...Is that her desire out of despair?

Giva believed that one starts to question existence when one's not living, but to inquire herself is how she knew she was, infact, living and yet not alive.

Would she quit what could possibly be called the suffering or is it a purpose?

The world seems to have made her believe that
she will have to take her thoughts, her feelings with her to the grave. With an impression like "No one needs to know 'cause nobody really understands or wants to" that the world left on her, she eventually gave up on people.

Such a wish why Giva had, could be fairly reasoned... With such depth that even Giva couldn't help but romanticize death when it came to herself- to somehow disappear.

What separates her and her wish is nothing but Death itself.
What could it be to hold her back from the sin, if nothing but God? And if she was to give in to it, that would only be so ungrateful and unfair, for the glass was always half full.

Yet, the other side seems to be the only way to sound peaceful. If there's one...
Is it the only way?
Is there the 'other side' ?

*Song: While I'm Alive by Lauren Jauregui, Femme it forward*

"I haven't celebrated my birthday in years..."