I am not ok
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- Parts 2
Ongoing7m
Last published Fri, Sep 30, 2022
For the past couple days I've been having semi-major anxiety. It's hard to sleep, because when I sleep I dream. And when I dream I have nightmares. And when I have nightmares I wake up in a cold sweat and my heart bumping in my stomach, filled with dread as it keeps sinking. So many things have happened, too many things haven't gone my way. I am not ok.
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anxietyattacks
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He thought he loved her. But in his world, love meant waiting. Watching. Wanting. Mudassir has always been haunted-by his father's control, by years of silence, and by the memory of a girl from university who never knew him more than just an acquaintance. Post-graduation, still trapped in emotional ruin, he finds her again... but not the way he hoped. She's changed. She's moved on. She's engaged. But not him. To him, if it runs-it means chase. As obsession festers, therapy rooms turn into battlegrounds. Kindness is mistaken for invitation. And the line between affection and control begins to disappear. When the past claws its way back into the present, what can truly be salvaged-and what was never real to begin with? This isn't a typical love story, but a descent of obsession, projection, and the danger of trying to fit someone into the shape of your wounds. He didn't just fall in love with her. He built a life around wanting her. ... In the book cover, that's me lol and is made and photographed by me. ... ⚠️ Trigger Warning: This story contains depictions of mental illness (depression, anxiety, OCD, narcissistic traits), suicidal ideation, emotional abuse, death threats, substance use, and toxic family dynamics. Reader discretion is strongly advised. If you're struggling, know that help exists, and you are not alone. ❤️
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