The Lion, The Witch, And The Audacity Of This Bitch
- Reads 64,700
- Votes 2,922
- Parts 53
- Time 5h 12m
- Reads 64,700
- Votes 2,922
- Parts 53
- Time 5h 12m
Complete, First published Sep 30, 2022
Because the title is probably to long: The Lion, The Witch, And The Audacity Of This Bitch Y/n, Shalnark, and Killua become online friends, and all of them are sleep deprived idiots with more mental issues than you can count. Or A story where Y/n, Shalnark, and Killua have a diet of energy drinks, pop tarts, and absolutely no sleep. Chaos ensues. This is a reader insert. I will be using They/Them pronouns for the reader, feel free to imagine them as your pronouns. The reader will be a child in this, so all relationships are platonic. đTWsđ â˘Ooc characters â˘Cussing â˘Mentions of suicide/Suicidal jokes â˘Hisoka â˘Idiotic author â˘No respect for the fourth wall â˘Terrible fanfic in general â˘Mentions of sex â˘If you're actually reading this you're hot â˘Mentions of abuse (Have you seen Killua's family) â˘(Terrible) Puns â˘Absolutely no plot â˘We've replaced plot â˘Absolute chaos>Plot â˘By absolute chaos I mean Y/n gets a gun â˘Y/n should not be allowed to have a gun â˘Damn, still reading this? You single? đ â˘A lot of gay shit â˘By gay shit I mean a shit load of glitter bombs â˘Mentions of violence/violent activities â˘Probably more Like most of my fanfics, I have no idea where this is going to go, just chaos, pure chaos. I don't own HxH yet I don't own any of the art used is this bookAll Rights Reserved
Table of contents
- â ď¸Warningâ ď¸Mon, Oct 31, 2022
- 1: How to officiate a weddingMon, Oct 31, 2022
- 2: How to (safely?) put a bee in your mouthMon, Oct 31, 2022
- 3: How to become a god amongst the weird childrenMon, Oct 31, 2022
- 4: How to lose all your (nonexistent) friendsMon, Oct 31, 2022
- 5: How to become a Disney Prince/PrincessWed, Nov 2, 2022
- 6: How to make a good smoothieThu, Nov 3, 2022
- 7: How to acquire a missile laucherFri, Nov 4, 2022
- 8: How to be a master of deceptionFri, Nov 4, 2022
- 9: How to perfectly boil your Pop-tartsFri, Nov 4, 2022
- 10: How to communicate with a pterodactylFri, Nov 4, 2022
- 11: How to overthrow the governmentSun, Nov 6, 2022
- 12: How to burn a toasterMon, Nov 7, 2022
- 13: How to make a leftover Kentucky Fried Children sandwichTue, Nov 8, 2022
- 14: How to create a hedgehog missile launcherThu, Nov 10, 2022
- 15: How to throw half your child in a trash canFri, Nov 11, 2022
- 16: How to snort wormsSat, Nov 12, 2022
- 17: How to end up dying (Unless you have plot armor)Sun, Nov 13, 2022
- 18: How to choke on an airplaneMon, Nov 14, 2022
- 19: How to acquire a slaveTue, Nov 15, 2022
- 20: How to find out you're a hamsterWed, Nov 16, 2022
- 21: How to become a Phantom troupe member :DThu, Nov 17, 2022
- 22: How to ruin Unicorn's lifeMon, Nov 21, 2022
- 23: How to break out of jail!Fri, Nov 25, 2022
- 24: How to avoid doing chores: Idiotic StyleWed, Nov 30, 2022
- 25: How to break a giraffe out of prisonMon, Dec 5, 2022
- 26: How to (barely) survive a month of chores with Killua and Y/nWed, Dec 7, 2022
- 27: How to make trees screamSat, Dec 10, 2022
- 28: How to not think of a fucking chapter title. The author is a idiot.Mon, Dec 12, 2022
- 29: How to get away with murder by evolving into a cricketThu, Dec 15, 2022
- 30: How to be an Examiner and still fail the Hunter Exam.Fri, Dec 16, 2022
- 31: How to create a filler chapter because the author is lazyFri, Dec 16, 2022
- 32: How to parent child terribly. Die in process.Sat, Dec 17, 2022
- 33: How to regret all your life decisionsSat, Dec 17, 2022
- 34: How to adopt a completely normal cat that can talkSat, Dec 17, 2022
- 35: How to eat pizza inside out and look normal doing itSat, Dec 17, 2022
- FUCK SHIT BITCH FUCKWed, Dec 21, 2022
- 36: How to properly interrogate a fishThu, Feb 2, 2023
- 37: How to actually stop abortionsThu, Feb 9, 2023
- 38: How to make your fridge become a suicide bomberTue, Feb 14, 2023
- 39: How to get sexually assaulted by a green beanTue, Feb 21, 2023
- 40: How to (finally) get marriage counselingTue, Feb 28, 2023
- 41: How to get kidnapped. A PowerPoint by Killua and Y/nFri, Mar 3, 2023
- 42: How to kidnap a kangarooThu, Mar 9, 2023
- 43: How to betray everybody and create a kingdom in the processTue, Mar 14, 2023
- 44: How to get adopted by the ZoldycksSun, Mar 19, 2023
- 45: How to legally put babies (that may or may not be yours) in your pocketSat, Mar 25, 2023
- 46: How to play capture the flag but the flag is actually Y/n and KilluaSat, Apr 22, 2023
- 47: How to unsuccessfully sacrifice your friend to the spider godMon, Apr 24, 2023
- 48: How to start a food fight, but your lives end up in dangerWed, Apr 26, 2023
- 49: How toMon, May 1, 2023
- 50: How to get them good good tax benefitsđŤđŤWed, May 3, 2023
- VOTINGWed, May 3, 2023
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