Humor Me - The DUFF Movie - Wattpad

Humor Me

Reads 107,862
Votes 2,437
Parts 4
Time 1h 4m

Reads 107,862
Votes 2,437
Parts 4
Time 1h 4m

For the first time, the heroine might not even need a guy to seal her happy ending.

When Melonie tells her boyfriend: ‘John, I think I’m asexual’, she turns single, friendless and terribly heartbroken within a day. She could probably be considered as an aquatic creature from all the tears she’s been swimming in. 

Her label as ‘John’s Girlfriend’ now stripped off, she becomes a ‘nobody’ and is on the verge of changing herself for her ex. Until she meets the school’s alpha, Jupiter Rogan, a superior, pretentious nerd with a ‘too-cool-for-romance’ attitude, and begs to become like her, wanting to be admired by everyone instead of being looked down upon. 

But once befriending the tight pack of elite nerds, although Jupiter proves to her you don’t need a boy to be happy and illustrates self-appreciation; how the empowerment of femininity, friendship and happiness can exist without young love—things don’t go as planned.&amp;amp;nbsp; 

Can Melonie accept herself for who she is or will she get carried away in the transformation?All Rights Reserved

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Tough Love by Eilidh_escape101

To everyone, Freya Daniels has everything anyone could ever ask for. Not to her though, she doesn't even have the opportunity to make decisions for herself. When she grows up, she is to take over her father's Oil company even though she knows nothing about it and couldn't care less. She believed her life couldn't get any worse until...... * * * "You are so naïve so I know you'll hate me for this but it's for your own good." "You're usually straight to the point dad. What is all this about?" "We're going to meet the future father-in-law of my daughter and his son" he stoically says with a hint of amusement. "WHAT!" "Calm down frey_" "How can you tell me to calm down?! You better have another secret daughter somewhere because I CANNOT be whom you're talking about" "I'm trying to protect you, trust me" "Don't even dare try to manipulate me. I don't want to run your company yet you want to force me to go to business school which I don't give a bull about and now this?!" "Oh please, the fashion thing is just a phase, you'll get over it. This world is filled with terrible people, you're so naïve, how could you possibly decide who you'll spend the rest of your life with?" "Oh and you of all people know who's right for me?" I let out a cynical laughter. * * * * Fated to Marry the shamelessly flirtatious and fun loving Aiden Savant who believes he has everything and who just like her father, does not believe in love but has the life goal of making his father's company prosper even more. Throw in trying in situations and surprises, will they happen to be what they need? Or Will their story finally combat the saying "opposites attract" and be a chaotic and ill fated match ? {If you're seeing this that means I've finally stopped procrastinating, This is my first story, I hope you like it. ಠ⁠◡⁠ಠ}

Playing By The Rules by AngelDeVil72

Melanie Baker has a secret. She was once a perfect wife to her husband and she never complained about anything. She was content with her life and following what she thought she was supposed to be like in a wife. It wasn't until she found out the infidelity of her husband that made her change her mind. Therefore Melanie decided to play by the same rules and live her life on her own terms. Melanie decides she wants to become more uninhibited and live to make herself happy, regardless of the feelings of insignificant others. Melanie feels that guys that she has come across have basically taken her for granted. Therefore she plans to give guys a taste of their own medicine. Melanie knows how to play the game and play it well. She's been hurt in her past and her marriage was the final draw. Not only does she have her secret sexual escapades but her alter ego, Vanessa is only worrying about getting hers with no feelings left out on the table. No commitments and no promises; she's decides to be come the "Player" in the game. Vanessa starts getting hers by all means necessary and she enjoys every encounter. *Excerpt From The Marriage* [Freddy] You know it is baby. I wish you could suck it. I want to feel your tongue across my tip. [Vanessa] Ooo yeah baby, I want to taste your cum on my lips. I started touching myself as I was getting horny just reading his words. I hadn't come in a long time and it was overdue. My husband no longer satisfied me and he wasn't really trying to accomplish the feat. He usually gets his and goes to sleep, like fuck you, I got mine. So I'll just get mine when and where and with whom I please. 'Cause why the fuck not? He's doing it. I'm sure of it. Nobody leaves their wedding ring behind as much as this motherfucker did. Warning: ** This novel does include explicit sexual adult situations**

Help Me Pick Up The Pieces {Completed} (GirlXGirl) [TeacherXStudent] by Whatever81

*Destined to Be series book one. Not necessary to read Book one before book two.* Achievements: #1 in Lesbianromance [August 14th, 2019] #4 in Lesbian [September 30th, 2019] #5 in GirlxGirl [August 26, 2019] Avery has had a tough life, a very tough life. She feels like the universe is forever against her. And never thought that, even after everything she's endured, she would ever get her 'Happily Ever After'. Then one day she thinks it may be possible. The woman she had been in love with for years, finally returns her feelings. Avery was finally happy, the woman she loved so much for so long, finally loved her back. Her 'Happily Ever After' was within reach. At least that's what she thought, until the woman managed to shatter Avery's already broken heart into a million pieces. Months later, the wound still fresh, she packs up her stuff and moves back to the city where she was born. She thinks being in a different city and reconnecting with her childhood best friend, will help her heal. But, nothing seems to change at all. At least not until one night about 2 months later. Her friend drags her to a club. To get her friend off her back, she finds a girl to pick up. She expected for it to be a one night stand and that was it but she desperately wants to see the woman again. And she ends up getting her wish but the next time they see each other it's in one of the most unexpected of situations. Just when she was starting to think that she might be able to be happy again, it all goes to crap. Her life seems to be a never ending string of heart break. Maybe the whole universe really is against her. Warning: This story's going to get a bit dark/depressing. And even though it's clearly labeled as such but I still feel I need to say this is a mature girlxgirl story so there will be sex. Also don't read if you have a problem w/ the word fuck because I use it quite liberally.

THOSE GOOD TEEN YEARS 3 CRUSHES NO MORE by thebluefrostgiant

The third teen year. Our young teens are fifteen, and high school is not merciful. And now, the boys are getting smarter. They want to be with their crushes,and want to pursue a 'serious' relationship. They don't want to beat around the bush. And when boys are determined, they're hotter than Hades trying to kidnap Persephone~ and they will succeed. And girls, they realize that sometimes, they have to make the first move. Ego just hurts you; why not just accept the inevitable and not wait for lousy boys who're scared of their intense feelings? Social and cultural issues are raised, and one thing is clear. There are Crushes No More. It's LOVE (gasp!) and, it's for real this time. No more stuttering and shying away from the truth. Friendship is tested, and trust is developed. Will the teenagers be able to handle this teen year? Watch out for the melodrama (it might be too much. After all, we're talking about TEENAGERS here. Duh.) Happy reading!

Utopia | Percabeth Royalty AU by aaaadashi

{u·to·pi·a ~ yo͞oˈtōpēə ~ an imagined place or state of things in which everything is perfect} *** After the great war of the world, Earth's remaining citizens were sectioned off by the gods into five utopias, all on different continents, and all without the technological advances we have today. *** The gods, pleased with their work, left the mortals to control their own lives, and retired their power to hosts. *** In what was once the United States, lives a fiercely loyal boy named Percy, prince of the ocean trine of the great utopia known as Olympia. *** Also in the ocean trine of Olympia, lives a frighteningly intelligent girl, Annabeth, the daughter of the king's main advisor. *** Annabeth and Percy have been best friends since a very young age, and it is no surprise when the king sets them to marry each other, sensing Annabeth's powerful and influential qualities. *** When the utopian society starts to crumble and rebels begin to attack, the fate of Olympia will rest on the shoulders of the young prince and his betrothed. *** [Formerly entitled Running in the Rain] *** ¡DISCLAIMER! All characters are property of Rick Riordan, but the story line is entirely my own!

Book 3✔️ Sugary Goodness by LoveLiveLust

"Now, Gary. I understand that you're twenty-four. But I need you to train in restraining your sexual desire, you're not a horny teenager. So, we will not be leaving this restaurant for another half an hour. Then you're going to go to my place where I will exhaust you until you climax over and over again." She told me as she drinks her coffee slowly and started rubbing my upper thigh again. "Drink your coffee baby, you will need your strength." I smiled at her as she smiled back knowingly. "Say thank you, mistress." She whispered in my ear, making me groan, as I instantly got hard again. ***** When Gary worked for Adriana it was for the experience, and for the amount of money that they offer for an easy administration job. He was a boxer by night, it was his hobby, his real passion in life. Then the time came when he needed more money because of his brother, who was doing bets on the side for his boxing match. Gary's name was on the line because he refused to fix the game. He already drained his account, but he was not coming up with enough money. Until he finally came to Adriana and took on her offer to be a sugar baby. ***** Megan is a very well-known businesswoman. She was raised the hard way, where she didn't have the luxury of money. Now that she's a billionaire in the making, she doesn't have the time to date. But she likes to play, and she was bored being hassled by men for her money until she found Adriana. Her company was a time saver for Megan. She offered exclusivity to all the gorgeous men that she could choose from. Until one fateful day when Gary showed up instead of her usual companion. From him, she learned the true meaning of living. Will, she finally settled down with him? Will he ever be comfortable around her wealth? Let's dive in and find out, shall we? ******** *Warning! R-Rated for 18+ due to strong, explicit language and sexual content*

For The Empire - Sempre by LJRae0328

[Book 3] My lips are a whisper away from meeting hers. The anticipation, of tasting her addictive flavor again, is overwhelming. "There's someone else." The words send an electric current through me, jolting me out of my lust filled moment. Her hauntingly, beautiful eyes, fill with tears as they stare back at me. "I thought you were dead, JP." A lone tear streaks down her face. I turn away, heading for the door, my desire and lust is now consumed by raging anger, coursing through my veins. But as I look back at her, I realize I don't care. "He better be ready for a fight. There's no way in hell, I'm giving you up easily." --------- They say, "All's Fair in Love and War" but is it really? Stella and JP are driven apart repeatedly. Whether from their own choices and mistakes, or from the meddling and interfering of others, yet they always find themselves being pulled back to each other one way or another. After years apart, they're once again brought together, whether by fate or something else and they struggle with overcoming old fears, doubts and desire. They're faced confronting old enemies as well as new ones, while taking on the challenge of raising a family that was left in their care. Will they finally come together and become the undeniable and powerful Mafia King and Queen they were destined to be? United in purpose and love. Or will they walk away from it all, including each other? **Book 3**Final book in For The Empire Series (Not a stand alone) ***CONTAINS MATURE THEMES, SEXUAL CONTENT, LANGUAGE AND VIOLENCE*** Highest Rankings: #2 in Mafia Stories 7/23/2022 #89 in Mafialove 7/23/2022 © 2021 LJ RAE

SEVEN DAYS by Estyshawl

"What colour of panties are you wearing?" "Excuse me?" She countered "I won't repeat the question again" "Red. They're red" she swallowed "Reach below your gown. Pull it. And hand it over to me" "Why would you want it? It's just a piece of material" she faltered. "They're yours. I want it simply because they're yours. You're aroused. So they're wet. They're going to be soaked with your juices. The very essence of you. I'm going to sniff it, lick it, all the while imagining that it's you, torturing myself until Saturday. The day I fuck you" ~♦||•♦•||♦~ In this erotic romance, Raven Edens is forced to accept an offer, to save her family's life. She's been a good girl her whole life, always took responsibility, always did what was right. Until the day she finds out, her father sold her family to the devil. literally. And she's the one who has to pay. These men were rich, ruthless, and fucking dangerous. If they wanted, they could make her entire family disappear from the face of the Earth. And to pay off her family's debts, she must give herself to the master, for 7 days, for he and the whole bloody organization to do whatever they wanted with her. seemed a small price to pay, for the billions her father owed right? but does she come out of this, the same? 7 days of the utimate sins. carnality was welcomed. Nothing was shunned out. Every fantasy, every desire was fed, explored, and she was the meal. RAVEN EDENS: "7 days of the utmost sins. I'm terrified! I'm surrendering to the unknown. I've never done that before. I exist on control. And to unleash that to someone else, is devastating. I'm afraid my body's going to shatter, or war and say it has needs. I'm afraid I can't keep my body in a tight leash, and under control, after this. One thing's sure though. I'm never going to remain the same again. WARNING: MATURE CONTENT! & EXPLICIT SEX SCENES! (Also, there may be lots of swearing, sexual coercion & public sexual displays!)

My Broken YOU by brandon61386

****Updated and re-edited*****Dec of 2024 In her last year of college, Madison Harlow breaks up with her childhood boyfriend. They've never been anything but close friends and a kiss. No one knew he was unstable and would take his life, which in turn forced Madison to want to live more of a life. Madison has always been a good girl; not even sure she knows what a true kiss feels like. She thinks she's going to spend her last year in college partying with her best friend. Until her polar opposite shows up. Mason Pembrook, a guy that has a new girl every night. He's never dated a girl and he's never used the word 'love' ever in his life. Mason and Madison find an immediate attraction to each other even though they are far from being alike. Mason forces Madison to dislike him because romance scares him. Madison hides her true feelings deep down inside of her. One night is all it takes for Mason to take Madison's virginity and create a wild, toxic, and addicting romance between the two of them. What brought her to him? Is it because Mason is broken, and Madison believes she has to fix everyone? Is it because not only did he take her virginity, but he made her feel what a true kiss feels like? Or is it because she's become addicted to the arousing feelings and pleasure he can give her? These two are no good for each other but can't stay away. They are magnets in this universe, attracted from thousands of miles away no matter what happens. The fights they have would end any relationship, yet they keep going back to each other. The more they are together the more they fall in love with each other. The more they make love with each other the more they realize what true love feels like. The more they fight the further they end up away from each other. Can true love and arousing romance be more powerful than the arguments and disapproval they can have for each other? To Madison, Mason is 'My broken YOU'

The Jock Trap by theduffmovie

Meredith and Finn were once friends. Things were fine until middle school, when over the space of a summer Finn got “hot” and all the popularity that came with it, leaving Meredith to slowly drift away. Now, in their senior year of high school, their history as childhood friends couldn’t feel any more distant. While Meredith wants to get through high school asquickly as possible so she can move onto college, Finn is breezing through the social side. With his spot on the swim team, buckets of natural charisma and a well-earned position in the popular crowd, he’s been set for the entire four years. Meredith is convinced she has his crowd figured out; she knows they’re all stuck-up airheads and is happy to avoid them all. Especially Finn. When an incident in biology class leads to Finn getting them both into detention, Meredith sees it as just another reason to hate him. However, as the pair spend more time together, she comes to realize that maybe her preconceived beliefs about his crowd aren’t as accurate as first thought. There is a lot more to Finn than meets the eye. Ever since his dad walked out on his mom five years ago, his mom has worked unsociable hours in a dead-end job as a waitress just to support the family. Finn has spent his entire high school life trying to scrape decent grades and earn a swim scholarship to college, while balancing helping his mom out with his younger siblings. He doesn’t have it as easy as Meredith assumed. As the pair get closer again, Finn is able to wear down Meredith’s cynicism and possibly weave his way into her heart as well.

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Slide 1 of 10

Tough Love cover

Playing By The Rules cover

Help Me Pick Up The Pieces {Completed} (GirlXGirl) [TeacherXStudent] cover

THOSE GOOD TEEN YEARS 3 CRUSHES NO MORE cover

Utopia | Percabeth Royalty AU cover

Book 3✔️ Sugary Goodness cover

For The Empire - Sempre cover

SEVEN DAYS cover

My Broken YOU cover

The Jock Trap cover

Tough Love

To everyone, Freya Daniels has everything anyone could ever ask for. Not to her though, she doesn't even have the opportunity to make decisions for herself. When she grows up, she is to take over her father's Oil company even though she knows nothing about it and couldn't care less. She believed her life couldn't get any worse until...... * * * "You are so naïve so I know you'll hate me for this but it's for your own good." "You're usually straight to the point dad. What is all this about?" "We're going to meet the future father-in-law of my daughter and his son" he stoically says with a hint of amusement. "WHAT!" "Calm down frey_" "How can you tell me to calm down?! You better have another secret daughter somewhere because I CANNOT be whom you're talking about" "I'm trying to protect you, trust me" "Don't even dare try to manipulate me. I don't want to run your company yet you want to force me to go to business school which I don't give a bull about and now this?!" "Oh please, the fashion thing is just a phase, you'll get over it. This world is filled with terrible people, you're so naïve, how could you possibly decide who you'll spend the rest of your life with?" "Oh and you of all people know who's right for me?" I let out a cynical laughter. * * * * Fated to Marry the shamelessly flirtatious and fun loving Aiden Savant who believes he has everything and who just like her father, does not believe in love but has the life goal of making his father's company prosper even more. Throw in trying in situations and surprises, will they happen to be what they need? Or Will their story finally combat the saying "opposites attract" and be a chaotic and ill fated match ? {If you're seeing this that means I've finally stopped procrastinating, This is my first story, I hope you like it. ಠ⁠◡⁠ಠ}