Brilliant Liars

Whether you want to believe it or not, God is real.
Hi. I'm God.
Another fun fact, I may have a drinking problem. You try to deal with humans and free will and see how it goes. We all fuck up. It is what it is. I can't just go and smite them all in one fell swoop. What a waste of bloody time that would be. Not to mention my only son dying in vain if I just gave it all up.
So, alas; here I am. Sadly, while I am the almighty, there are still rules. I wasn't the first, I didn't create EVERYTHING, and I gotta abide by the laws too. Drinking and driving is not allowed on any plane of existence. I got busted, killed a kid, and ended up doing time in a prison called Sub7 that we're NOT gonna talk about AT ALL, EVER, and now I'm in AA meetings...court ordered. It's bullshit.
That's all.
Being Immortal is bullshit.
Being surrounded by these creeps that I'm the only one to blame for, also bullshit.
And this story is bullshit.