Brilliant Liars

Brilliant Liars

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WpMetadataReadMatureComplete Mon, Nov 14, 20229m
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Fiction
Romance
Whether you want to believe it or not, God is real. Hi. I'm God. Another fun fact, I may have a drinking problem. You try to deal with humans and free will and see how it goes. We all fuck up. It is what it is. I can't just go and smite them all in one fell swoop. What a waste of bloody time that would be. Not to mention my only son dying in vain if I just gave it all up. So, alas; here I am. Sadly, while I am the almighty, there are still rules. I wasn't the first, I didn't create EVERYTHING, and I gotta abide by the laws too. Drinking and driving is not allowed on any plane of existence. I got busted, killed a kid, and ended up doing time in a prison called Sub7 that we're NOT gonna talk about AT ALL, EVER, and now I'm in AA meetings...court ordered. It's bullshit. That's all. Being Immortal is bullshit. Being surrounded by these creeps that I'm the only one to blame for, also bullshit. And this story is bullshit.
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Between 2004 and 2008 I wrote a series of "Tips for Writers" for Nocturnal Ooze magazine vaguely about what would happen in real life if you did the things they do in movies but mostly about the gross out. I've always loved them and so have taken them out of mothballs for a new audience here on wattpad. They're all here except for #13 which seems to have vanished. I've also left them mostly intact except for a few very dated references that have been updated. I own the rights to the articles and Queen Mum of the Ooze, Kay Patterson has allowed me to keep the name "Gore Monger" (which she owns) provided I write: The Gore Monger appears courtesy of Nocturnal Ooze. If you enjoy these articles, please consider supporting me on Patreon. https://www.patreon.com/NogginBrain?fan_landing=true

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