Disordered
- Reads 4,072
- Votes 97
- Parts 10
The daily struggles of an anorexic mind and how with every breathe she takes she falls deeper in the hands of her mental illness pulling her deeper into a sinking whole of her own mind.
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Starving For Help
"I smile everyday. I live my life like nothing is wrong with me. No one would ever guess that I'm screaming inside or that I've secretly been hiding this huge part of my life. No one would ever know that I cry myself to sleep at night or that deep down I'm starving for help." Welcome to Anorexia. Your hostess is Ana. She'll take over from here. Suffering alone inside of your mind from a terrifying mental disorder, is something that even those who battle such a thing every day, cannot fully understand. It's like being alone 24/7 yet it's never quiet inside of your head. You can't stop the voices. You can't control your emotions. As it gets worse, you lose control of your body all together. You become prey to your disease and You can't fight back. That is what it's like for someone who has spent years of their life suffering in silence from an eating disorder. Fighting a monster that you have no chance of beating. It's almost impossible to describe the type of torture that consumes your mind. Hell. It's equivalent to pure hell.Complete
Junior Year
everything started going downhill and now everyone's in this hole; that no one can get out.Complete
The Death Of Me
A girl has her problems, no matter what happens. There will always be a biological problem with a girl, even if she denies the problemβs existence. She will have your days whenever she is down. Her problems... killing her soul little by little. But she doesnβt always want the death to be apart of her. As she fights her depression, the numbers of scars rising and the blood being lost, Ever-Grace finds herself losing herself. With the departure of her friends companionship and her boyfriendβs love, will she ever be the same ever again? Will she ever be in love with herself like she used to be? With sanity ever be apart of her everyday life like it used to be? Will it come so easily like it once was...? Will anything ever be the same like it used to be or will it ever not? There are so many questions to be answered but nothing that the tendency of being answered. As time passes by with all the stupid emotion, she loses herself. She loses the love for herself that might never return. Or will it? Nothing is guaranteed. Not even the death of me.Complete
Broken
Have you ever wondered what goes on inside of the mind of a truly broken soul? The mind of a person with severe mental disorders. The one who smiles on the outside but is really dying within. The one that always appears happy. The person that you'd never guess was suffering every single day. Have you ever questioned what could break a person so badly? Have you ever wanted to get inside the mind of that person? This poetry is mine. This is me, opening my damaged mind to be discovered. Inside you'll find the raw emotions of a truly broken soul.Complete
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Rita becomes strict with her eating, everyday the number of calories she eats gets lower and the amount of time she does cardio gets higher. She practices of managing her starvation by distracting it and never catches a break on the scale. Nobody is aware of it, it was something Rita doesn't want her friends or family to know, hiding her body from them didn't last long. Her mother noticed the dramatic weight change on her body. She tries to help her get back to her eating and tells her many times that she's "perfectly skinny" but nothing works. Her mother puts her foot down as Rita started to get ill, her mom takes her to a mental health hospital. She deals with consequences from her nurses and other patients.Complete
πππ πππ¦ π¦ππ’ πππ‘π‘π ππππππ§π π‘βππ‘ π‘βπ π βππ‘ π¦ππ’ ππ ππππππ‘π πππ‘ ππ’π π‘ π¦ππ’, ππ’π‘ ππ£πππ¦πππ ππππ’ππ π¦ππ’.
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