Intrusive Thoughts

My intrusive thoughts have been getting worse lately and I need to get them out or I'll go insane

I've had intrusive thoughts since I was a kid in the form of maladaptive daydreaming and repetitive thoughts that wouldn't leave me until I acted on them. These are mostly harmless.

Lately my intrusion thoughts have been focusing on self mutilation. Horrific and graphic acts of violence upon the self flood my mind. Despite not having any tendencies towards self harming on my own, I can't stop thinking about hanging myself, slicing open my abdomen, shattering my skull on cement, punching glass so it cuts my hand, ect ect ect ect ect ect ect

This isn't really a story, just me trying to put my thoughts into words. I've never self harmed in actuality and hopefully never will, this is just a greatly disturbing fixation I've had recently.