LOST FOR THE HOLIDAYS
  • Reads 7
  • Votes 1
  • Parts 8
  • Time 1h 42m
  • Reads 7
  • Votes 1
  • Parts 8
  • Time 1h 42m
Complete, First published Jan 02, 2023
I felt lost. 
I didn't know where to start planning ahead. I thought I was but now that the "ahead" is the present. I don't know what I am doing. 
I believed, trusted that I knew who I was.
It took a literal miracle, to find out the truth I have been so afraid of facing.
But don't we all...
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"Talk to you about it?" I asked with a dark laugh. "it's not as easy as you make it sound," "Yes, Garret! Talking! You know what that is right? It's very easy! You just open your mouth and let the words that are in your head, come out of your mouth." "It's not that simple," I fought down emotions that were building up. "Yes, it is! See, i'm doing it right now!" "No-it's not!" "Yes!" "No!" "Yes! just talk, dang it!-" "You just expect it to be easy to talk about my dead parents?! About how guilty I feel for not visiting their grave for the past 11 years?! I didn't even realize how long it's been, I had pretty much forgotten about them for 11 years! Do you know what kind of guilt is eating at me right now!" I shouted in angst, my hands grabbing at the clothes on top of my head and pushing it into myself, wanting to just be shielded away from everything I was feeling, guilt, sadness, from thinking about more people I've lost in my life. Before I could even react, Keeley's tiny arms wrapped themselves around my torso. ~ 
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It started when the rain fell. As it hit the windows rhythmically, I fought my sleep. Fighting off the demons in my dreams. I hadn't realized how real that dream became. Waking up to terrified screaming. My heart racing, the lighting striking and my family begging for their lives. I claimed myself as a coward that very same night. I hated myself. My depression became the best of me. What's worst then your family being slaughtered? Hiding in the closet from the killers. I should've helped, I should've been there for them. The pain between my chest and stomach was growing guilt. So I started thinking smart. Looking at everyone differently. I decided to reopen their cold cases. And when I found the truth it hit me deep.