Welcome to the impromtu playhouse of the Ender Eye RemoversTM
Enter at your own risk and know, though it is easy to enter, it is impossible to exit. The Watchers see all.
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Look, I don't want to be here. You don't want me to be here. So. Why don't I explain why I'm in your stupid trap thing, and you can let me out and we can all get on with our lives?
Guidance: language, mild sex references.