anxiety

My name is Dakota, I’m 16.
A couple years ago I started to feel worse and worse, a deepening sickness throughout me. I pushed it back inside me because I didn’t want help. I was dealing with an alcoholic parent and an emotionally hurt mom at home and coping by self-harm to relieve the pain. At the time I thought I was truly alone, the only one around who was dealing with these immense problems through life. I soon learned I needed to reach out for help. I was taking a shower one night as I started sweating, and my heart raced. At the time I thought I was just stressed, but in reality I was having an anxiety attack. I went to bed shaking.
My thoughts started deteriorating, and my mind kept racing. I was pretty sure I was depressed. I had to tell someone, but I couldn’t face going alone to talk to anyone. My friend walked me to school guidance, and I told the counselors I thought I was depressed. From there, I went to my family doctor with my mom and dad. I admitted to self-harm out of guilt and feared being a family disgrace.