Sharp Teeth || ONC 2023

"Who's your favorite zomenby?" Rellek clapped happily.

Dao looked up from his files and gave them a death stare. "Not even a week ago you bit off my ear."

"Not the point. My point is, you don't even know any other zombie who's an enby. I've got to be your favorite."

"This is about my ear!"

"You grew it back!" Rel made a face at the memory of trying to chew Dao's ear. They loved that cartilaginous part of humans but now they knew that vampire ears were a no-go. "It tasted like sawdust in my mouth."

"Well, I liked that one. It's taking me some time to get used to the new ear," Dao huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "And how do you know what sawdust tastes like?"

"Desperate times, Daomir, desperate times."

***

Daomir is patient. He is as patient as a vampire can be.

He has waited a thousand years to find his true love. What's one more day? It's a blink of an eye when you're a vampire.

But when an oblivious zombie, who wants to eat him, turns out to be his soulmate in the middle of an apocalypse, Dao finds himself signing up for another century of patience for Rel to catch up with his feelings.

***

Here's a funny spin on the vampires, zombies, and apocalypse trope, set in India.