Me. - ChøxøRx!n - Wattpad

Story cover for Me. by murukae

Me.

GELESEN 197
Stimmen 8
Teile 121
Zeit 2h 57m

GELESEN 197
Stimmen 8
Teile 121
Zeit 2h 57m

collection deep deepthoughts emotional memories personal poem poembook poemcollection poetry poetrycollection unfiltered

These were all on my Instagram... (plus some new ones)
Then I began feeling something about it... I'm a quiet kid... always... but how did I put it all out... I didn't want the attention... I liked when I was of some help to anyone out there...
something I saw twice... a Billie Eilish clip...
pretty sure ik it was sent by the sane person both times... I remember the second though...
and I also remember being told of it without the clip...
so I decided to bring out all of those and put them on here... in this space...
besides my officially published poems that are on another book here... and also the few that I did when I was really young and have no documentation... or the ones I specifically wrote on my previous account... even ones I archived on Instagram for the extremely Raw kinda feel of me that it gives off...


https://www.wattpad.com/story/233179289?utm_source=android&utm_medium=link&utm_content=story_info&wp_page=story_details_button&wp_uname=murukae&wp_originator=9xbE%2BO3Im15gi1DMsNGGx6yHnWwTVrFPEhM5Ol221k86qyZZ%2F2sZjvn%2BJDTRLpep5lPEm%2FMvs%2FcxD%2FmvO39GUuFT93W9PwmlgBy0OyP%2BLBkoBw42X7r92Nv9d0xHLw3N


This is the compilation I did of these on my previous account...




P.S. I DIDN'T BLANK OUT ANYTHING ON THE SCREENSHOTS HERE MOSTLY BECAUSE I DON'T THINK IT WILL BE READ AT ALL... BUT I DO HOPE THEIR SPACE ISN'T THREATENED... THE LESS PUBLIC NATURE OF THIS PLATFORM IS WHY I DECIDED TO SHIFT THESE IN...Alle Rechte vorbehalten

collection deep deepthoughts emotional memories personal poem poembook poemcollection poetry poetrycollection unfiltered

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Never Ending Lies ✔️ von Simplewriter_31

{EDITING PROCESS} *BOOK ONE OF TWO* When a high school student named Davina Smith faces her senior year after a tragedy in her family, suddenly finds herself appealed to the new kids in town. She never had an interest in befriending anyone besides her childhood friends Emma and Jackson, But these kids had something about them that just made them stick out. Maybe it wasint such a bad idea to expand her social life. What could go wrong? Right..? ~~~~~~~~~~~ Davina Smith, a 17 year old with trauma of losing those close to her from past experiences and losses, is soon appealed to the new kids in town. Or more like appealed to the attractive black haired, green eyed boy. She's never been the one to want to have a relationship. Is now the time? Xavier Witts, a 18 year old boy hiding a nothing more than a couple lies... or so he says. Xavier never wanted to get attached to someone he could lose. He never to wanted to go through that again. But what happens when suddenly that person fights against his measures of protection? What happens when that person is willing to risk their life just to be with him? Luckily he would do the same ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I don't know what to do Xavier..." I cry uncontrollably into his chest as he holds onto me for dear life. "I know love. I know." "I'm such a bother to yall." I choke out. "I'm so fucking weak. I can't even defend myself." Xavier's arms unwrap from my body, and his hands hold my teary face. "I'm a worthless h-human." Xavier furrows his eyebrows in pain. A tear of his own falling down his face. "No," he says shaking his head. "No. You've never been a bother to me. You aren't weak. And you most certainly aren't worthless." I gasp to breathe, and he continues talking. "What you are is an amazing person who hasn't let all of this crazy bullshit affect her. You handled it like a champ. What you are is a strong, brave being that has stood by my side." I breathe as he leans closer. "What you are, is the love of my life...."

wilting roses von SicklySweet708

Another collection of (bad) poems. *tw: mentions of sexual assault, drug use, drinking, suicidal ideation and self harm* -a collection of poems that document my experiences with my mental health throughout high school. a warning: i had a few undiagnosed disorders, as well as a self harm addiction (in recovery now!!) so reader discretion is advised. started: November 2019 finished: May 2023

One Girl's Words von Sparkypaws

I see you've somehow stumbled upon, My amateur book of magic. Turn the page, if you wish, That would make me simply ecstatic :) Nothing but a girl who has a small talent with pen and paper. Decided to follow in the footsteps of my good friends @Crimsyy, @wordsnvisions and @Bondy11, and attempt to contain all the magic flowing in my soul into a book of poetry. Those three are amazing, but this is my work. My pale, flickering candle stub in a tiny puddle compared to their poetry, which is as radiant as the sun and as deep as the ocean. But still... Don't let that deter you! Read on, fellow wattpadian! Join me on this magical journey through the soul behind one girl's words... (Fair warning, this was written by my 12-14 year old self, who was very sweet but also incredibly cringey. She's still a part of me though, and I'm leaving this book up as a time capsule dedicated to her. So if I haven't already scared you away, prepare yourself for some pre-teen angst, authors notes galore and more than a few bad puns. I've also published a second poetry book, with some more recent work. Check that out if you want more, lovelies <3)

words from a broken soul von Emogamer2244

I don't own the two songs I've posted on the two newest poems but give them a listen if you like. just a collection of free verse/rondel poems(short stories to lengthy ones I guess) I've written over the course of ten months so far some won't be uploaded as I know they would get flagged as to dark of topics so yeah enjoy or don't. Feed back is helpful I didn't really pay attention in my English class during poetry so I don't really know how to punctuate the poems. Also I know the first one is pretty bad but it was the first I've ever written the rest I think are okay but we're our worst critics after all. Also there are some with dark topics such a suicidal ideation, abuse of a child, sexual abuse, and not technically a dark topic but metaphorical suicide which talks about suicide so you have been warned for when I get around to uploading the darker poems.

Scars von SarahORawe4

"If I risk it all, could you break my fall? How do I live? How do I breathe? When your not here i'm sufficated. I wanna feel love, run through my blood. Tell me is this where I give it all up? For you, I have to risk it all, Cuz the Writing's on the Walls." This is a story about a boy and a girl. She loves him, and he want's her dead. But he vowed to keep her safe..But how can he keep such a dangerous vow? *EXCERPT FROM BOOK BELOW* "Our story is like the movies. The movies with the happy endings?" I yelled as he got out of the car. "No! Our ending is nothing like those movies Vana. Our story is the both of us risking it all and then ending up right next to Kyle." He said and sighed. And he was right. Our ending is that one fucked up movie that no on wants to go see. "SO YOU AREN'T WILLING TO RISK IT ALL!?! I yelled louder as the rain came pouring down. He turned on his heal and stomped twords me pulling me close to him leaveing no space between us. His lips came crashing down on mine making the butterflies in my stomach errupt with pleaseure. He pulled away and sighed as did I. He grabbed my hand and ran his thumb over the knuckle of my thumb over my tattoo thanks to his stupid game of dare or dare. "Look at the perspective of things Vana. You might see a smily face but I don't. I see a sad face. You don't want my happy ending. Trust me." He said and sighed again. "I love you so much Vana." He said and kissed the top of my head and then walked back over to his house. But he didn't really love me. If he did he would be willing to risk it all just like I am. But I am left just like Kyle had suspected. Alone and heart broken in the rain. Because I was always the one willing to risk it all. For him.

Maybe von IronyDreams

An internal voice whispered, "Call him." But I chose not to. I dismissed it once more, saying, "He never liked me anyway." Yet the dilemma lingered. "But maybe he does. The way he looks at you... it's different." Out of nowhere, he glanced my way. My heartbeat quickened, sending shivers down my spine. I averted my gaze, pretending to look around. "Has he noticed me? No, wait-oh my god." --- After switching high schools, Nina discovered a new way of life. She fell in love, made wonderful friends, and everything seemed perfect. But Ethan-a popular boy who never focused on anyone but her-was the object of her hatred. He was always there, always keeping her safe. He used to annoy her endlessly. She hated him deeply. Until she didn't. For a while, she was content with her high school experience. That is, until something mysterious turned her world upside down. Forced to move to a new city, Nina had to cut ties with everyone she once knew. Eight years later, fate brings her face-to-face with him again. "Ethan..." He's the key to everything-the truths she never knew. When she was lost in the dark, he always held the light. But now, things are different. She despises him. He's colder than ever. Or perhaps she fears him. Fears that he'll leave her again. Will their lives ever return to normal after everything they've endured? "Maybe?" "Maybe yes. Maybe no?" --- Started: 8 November 2021 Ended: 19 December 2022 Rewritten: December 2024 --- ### Rankings Goals So Far: #1 Adolescente #1 given up #1 blinddates #1 pretend #10 twistedromance #50 high school romance --- ### Notice: This is my first published story, and it contains numerous grammatical errors and bad editing. If you're interested in the storyline, please don't judge me too harshly based on this book. Better stories are on the way-I'm still learning and improving every day. Enjoy! ✨

A fucking mess of poems dead stories von amberandshadow

FINISHED AND COMPLEATED. Just poems, I suppose. Or maybe a scrapbook of scars. A chaotic collage of half-born stories, abandoned plots, and feelings too loud to ignore. This isn't a novel. It's a graveyard of unwritten books- stitched together with ink and impulse. A little trauma here, a little heartbreak there. Addiction. Bad parents. Dangerous love. The usual mess. I never claimed to be a poet, but pain has a way of teaching rhythm. And when the stories in my head refused to become chapters, they became verses instead. My father? A ghost in flesh. A man who cradled needles more tenderly than he ever held me. He is an addict. A lover of oblivion. And I, the daughter left behind in the smoke of his escape. Does that make me a girl with "daddy issues"? Or just a girl still learning how not to bleed from wounds she didn't choose? This book is for the overthinkers, the almost-authors, the ones who feel too much and write too little- until the words finally spill out like blood on the page. Welcome to the ride. There's no exit. But there's poetry in the wreckage. Author's Note I didn't set out to write a book. I set out to survive my own mind. This is what happens when you have too many stories, too many ghosts, and not enough discipline to finish a single novel. So instead, I wrote poems- or something like them. Fragments. Feelings. Flashbacks. A scrapbook of the soul. Some of these pieces are fiction. Some are memory. Some are just what happens when you stare at the ceiling too long and let your thoughts rot into poetry. If you've ever had a thousand ideas and no idea where to start- if you've ever felt too broken to write but too full not to- this is for you. Thanks for riding with me. There's no map. No neat ending. Just the wreckage, and the words we make from it.

Moving In von _CallMe_Crazy

Blaze White is the New Girl at the Prep school in her mothers old home town. But her only goal for senior year is to keep a low profile, no friends, no parties and NO boys. Axel may be adored and worshipped by his peer-but he hates people, except 5. So when a beautiful but closed off girl suddenly enters his group. He is not welcoming of the mysterious beauty despite the pull they both feel. •••• WARNING: This was written many moons ago. I have decided to put it back up because of a large request from readers. However, I was a kid when I wrote this so take it with a grain of salt. *** Like a deer in head lights, I freeze and watch as the car comes towards me expecting to get hit. But to my surprise, the car swerves to the side slightly next to me and comes to a stop. I take a deep breath I didn't know I was holding at the driver's side door swings open and a very pissed off Axel steps out. "Thank god," I mumble and place my hands on my knees to catch my breath. "Blaze?" He says and I hate it. I hate how he says my name as if it's his. Like he knows it's the only thing I want to hear, him calling out to me, looking at me, focused to me. It's the first time in my life I wanted someone's attention so badly I didn't care how I got it. And that was too dangerous for me to hold onto. "Are you insane or some shit? I could have killed you!" He says and starts to walk towards me. I take a big breath and step back away from him, "s-stop! Axel," I stutter still panting. It's then he notices the blood on my hands and shirt. "Is that blood?" He asks staring at my shirt and I take another step back. "Stop, stay b-back," I try to say confidently but I can't even breath right. Realizing he won't listen I start to turn around planning to make a break for it. "Don't run from me Blaze it won't go well," he growls reading my thoughts causing me to freeze in my spot. "Do not ever think you can get away from me."

Trash Book of Extra. von BilanMuhidin

Warning: I am a weirdo. This will contain some thoughts of mine, some poems, some deep shit, some thoughts I have as I go through the journey of self-exploration, lmao. Some chapters may be seen as too controversial but whatever you know. I mean, reading this is your choice. You don't have to. I mean, I'd like you all to read every chapter but it's not a story book so you may skip some chapters you don't like and read the ones that you do like. P.S. I do not deny that my thoughts are somewhat influenced by my environment and experiences. Also, this is the real me. Some people think I'm quiet and cold-hearted but on the inside I'm actually a big softie with feelings. To be honest, it's kinda my fault since I hate revealing my emotions to other people or even asking for help until I have to. And even then, I start hating myself for being such a weakling. That is a major character flaw of mine that I must overcome!

Hidden Poetry von RosePoetry

A world of poems captured in a single book, written by a girl who played every role: the academic achiever, the loyal friend, the eldest daughter, and more. She was always the one chosen for the top rank, yet she was never the one chosen by love. This collection is a bridge across the years, composed of verses that trace a haunting evolution where the innocent wonders of childhood slowly sharpen into the cold realizations of the real world. Yours truly, RosePoet (Note: These entries are not arranged in chronological order; however, I have included dates to serve as a guide to navigate the journey through time.) Pinterest: Littlemisstaromilktea Achievements: #1- Poetry🥇 5/21/2025 #2- Poem Collection🥈 5/21/2025 #3- Love Poem🥉 5/23/2025 #3- Poetry Collection🥉 5/24/2025 #2- Poetry Collection🥈 5/25/2025 #2- Love Poem🥈 6/1/2025 #3- Love Poem🥉 6/5/2025 #3- Free Verse🥉 6/5/2025 #2- Free Verse🥈 6/5/2025 #3- Poem Collection🥉6/29/2025 #2- Poem Collection🥈 6/30/2025 #1- Poem Collection🥇 9/7/2025 #3- Poem Book🥉 9/7/2025 #2- Freeverse 🥈 9/9/2025 #2- Poem Book 🥈 9/12/2025 #1- Freeverse 🥇 9/12/2025 #3- Poem Collection 🥉 9/12/2025 #3- Love Poem🥉 9/12/2025 #2- Freeverse 🥈 9/14/2025 #3- Love Poem🥉9/14/2025 #2- Freeverse 🥈 11/6/2025 #1- Poem Collection🥇 11/27/2025 #2- Love Poem 🥈 11/27/2025 #2- Freeverse 🥈 11/27/2025 #2- Poem Book 🥈 11/27/2025 #3- Poetry Collection 🥉 11/27/2025 #1- Free Verse 🥇 11/29/2025 # 2- Poem Collection 🥈 11/29/2025 # 3- Poetry 🥉12/6/2025 # 2- Love Poem🥈 12/9/2025 # 2- Free Verse 🥈 12/9/2025 # 3- Poem Collection 🥉 12/9/2025 #3- Love Poem🥉12/12/2025 #3- Free Verse🥉12/12/2025 #1- Poetry Collection🥇1/9/2026 #1- Poem Collection 🥇1/9/2026 #1- Love Poem 🥇 1/9/2026 #1- Free Verse🥇1/9/2026 #2- Poem Book🥈 1/9/2026 #1- Poem Collection 🥇 2/5/2026 #2- Poem Book 🥈 2/5/2026 #2- Love Poem 🥈 2/5/2026 #1- Poem Book🥇 2/8/2026

She's The Girl Next Door (MAJOR EDITING) von Queen_Geek

'Bad Boys Ain't Good But Good Boys Ain't No Fun.' "Don't look, but it's the king of being horny behind you." I automatically looked behind me, making Autumn scoff at me. She shook her head. "Ace Ford." Autumn's face retorted in disgust. "Every girl's 'dream guy'." Her fingers made quotation marks. "Let me just tell you Jane, that boy is disgusting." Ace leaned against the railing of the bleachers. He pushed his dark brown hair back and smirked as he talked to one of the blonde cheerleaders. "How so?" I questioned, turning back towards her. She raised an eyebrow. "Just look at the guy, doesn't he just scream 'I won't have sex with you and immediately ditch you unless you have dubble D's and the IQ of a goldfish?'" "He can't be that bad." I said, causing her to snort. ___________ Warning: Very Mild cursing. That's why I'm making it PG13 guys. Read at own risk. Hope you guys like the story. ____________ 2k16 edit: Howdy, how are you doing this godawful day? Burning in hell for your sins? Same! Great. Now that the formalities are out the window I'd just like to say... WHY AM I SUCH A DISGRACE TO MANKIND. What is this writing /-~-\ oh goodness gracious. How does this doodoo have 6k reads *siiiiiiiigh* My writing has improved at ton (I am assuming) and this was my first book so please, pretty pretty please don't hate me for all the mistakes and plot holes. I- I am very ashamed myself. And Engelesh is NOT my first language either so haaaaa, life. Mistakes were made so don't kill me. Okay, that's all for me. I still hope you somehow enjoy the story nonetheless and have a GREAT existence! ______ 2020 update So, I started writing this when I was 11. I am 18 now and haven't edited this since I was 15. I hope that says enough. Try to ignore the spelling and grammar mistakes!

THE BOOK OF FORGOTTEN DELIBERATELY von divyanshi_muzhiyao

"Some truths don't set you free. They set you on fire." They told me not to open that book. They warned me with stories-old, crusty ones-about madness, about secrets best left untouched. They said the library's far wing was cursed. That the books in that section didn't whisper wisdom-they screamed. But curiosity has a strange way of settling into your bones, especially when you've lived your entire life inside walls built from someone else's truths. My name? It doesn't matter-not yet. This story isn't about names. It's about what was forgotten deliberately. And how I found it. I wasn't born a rebel. I didn't want to challenge kingdoms or rewrite history. I just wanted to understand who I was, why I felt out of place, and what those strange dreams meant. The ones with burning skies and voices calling me by a name no one else knew. This isn't a tale of heroes and villains. It's messier than that. It's about a girl who found a truth so big, it didn't fit into her world. And maybe-just maybe-it won't fit into yours either. But I'll tell it anyway. Because stories like this-whispers like these-were never meant to stay silent. Disclaimer This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, events, places, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons (living or dead), events, or locales is purely coincidental. The stories in this book are designed to entertain, provoke thought, and explore a range of emotions and themes. They do not intend to offend or represent any belief system, historical accuracy, or cultural narrative in a literal way. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form without the prior written permission of the author.

Runaway von lebanerd

I ran, and I ran, and I ran, trying to get as far away from the mansion as possible. I was too weak to shift, but my determination kept me running. The house disappeared from my line of vision, and I was soon surrounded by greens. I didn't know where I was going, and at this moment, I didn't care. I was officially a fugitive. Angry screams followed by howls echoed through the forest: they noticed my absence. I let out an airy laugh. I was a runaway, but I was free. Finally free. -- [Completed + Under Major Editing] Some comments that I really appreciated: "please continue. it sounds really interesting!!!" ~GalaxyWolf78 "AHSJSKZUZIDNANSN?? *^^^^^*" ~Sarah-Senpaii "MORE MORE I NEED MOAR OF MY DAILY VITAMINS" ~Sarah-Senpaii "Love this book" ~DisneyisEternal "Awwweeeeeeeeeee sooooooooo ccuuuuuttteeeeeee aaannnddd AWESOME!" ~CrownofSpades "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!!!!!!!" ~dustbunny101 "SAVAGE" ~TrustMe_ImFine "omg no way" ~dimatabbara "*sighs* " ~lolitscherish "Lol. Thumbs up 4 randomness. " ~Mocha15Years "No!! That's not allowed to happen. Radiance and Kevin had bonding time then you were just like, "la di da di da.... Let's just screw with every bodies minds and [spoiler that I censored]. I'm sure they'd have absolutely no problem with that as an ending of the first book..." Wanna know what I think about that?!? I think you are an awesome author who knows how to drive their readers crazy. I have respect for that and hope you start the next book soon please....." ~angelic_illusions "Omg I need more wat happen I'm crying like crazy right now O MYYYYYY GOOOOOOOODDDDDDDDDD I love this book so much I want more pllllllllzzzzzzzzzx" ~faith133 Me: I'm sorry for killing a few people during the story GabyDart: "'A few' Means half the cast and the main is almost, if not, mortally wounded."

𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝚑𝚘𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚊𝚕 𝕔𝕣𝕪 •ᴬ ᶠⁱⁿⁿ ʷᵒˡᶠʰᵃʳᵈ ᶠᵃⁿ ᵐᵃᵈᵉ ˢᵗᵒʳʸ• von zoe_wheela

You are a 14-year-old girl named Zoe and your dad is Finn Wolfhard. You don't have a mom, because she died shortly after you were born. But you do have Millie Brown, who is the closest thing to your mom because she's always been there for you and helped you with everything girly in life. You were never really close with Finn's side of the family, as your grandma died when you were young and you were told that your "grandpa died"too and you're not really fond with your uncle Nick because he kinda is out of the picture.... Since your dad is famous, you are famous as well. And that takes a toll on your mental health. One day you're chilling in your room and it all goes to hell you think you got your period but it takes a turn for the worst. Will you make it out alive? And how will this affect Finn? (I really didn't want to type all of that y/n so I just gave a name which is actually my name. Feel free to change it to your name whenever you read Zoe.) I'm new to this writing stuff for me have typed a little bit fast and either misspelled something or it did not come out the way it was supposed to be typed. I apologize for that....Just comment the mistake and I will try to fix it. Please note I was going through a weird like phase or something. I don't know..puberty? and on chapter 14, I may have added the word Daddy so please ignore that that was just so weird and I could change it, but to be honest, I kind of think it's funny. It makes me cringe every time I read it. So I'm not...

Emotional Writings Dump von Rainbow2029

Sooooo this is gunna be out here, my first Wattpad booky. Y'all just a warning, (even tho you can probably tell by the description already) I write, A LOT so if you're bored and got some time, come on down! Disclaimer, this booky boi has no plot or order buuutttt maybe there's a time line? This book is pretty much a dump of writings that I make for myself from time to time. I don't often put a date with them but it is what it is. Some of them were during the summer before my first year of high school. Others are just strong feelings I've faced at one point in this year. Lots are probably just me writing about when I had someone I loved in my life. Keep in mind any new chapters or addings are probably here because I'm facing that junk in life rn. But yeah, lots of writings are kinda sad so if you're not looking to be in a sad child mood then I recommend a skips on this bookaru. I'm not on Wattpad to much, only to check on my fan girl things, (but I'm often in dead fandoms) and look for cool comics n stuff, so this book might get ignored until I find something to complain about in like, five months. Y'all this a big warning, I didn't really spell check this child and I'm kinda cringing right now, realizing how stupid this book is gunna be but my notes are getting full. Also most of these might be incomplete cuz even on a rampage, my fire just burns out and suddenly I get writers block (but mostly it's probably cuz I write loads of these at like three am). I'll probably add some little authors note at the end because I'm scared and because these are like, extremely personal. (Fr they probably got the names of real human peoples in them but no one will ever find mine booketh). Another Disclaimer; this book is not intended in anyway to be of use or of advice to anyone about anything, this book is pretty much just storage.... I started this book baby on : 9/4/18 An I done finished this o boi on : ion know yet, probably never. Sike it be done on : 9/23/18

The Original Tribrid (Reincarnated In TVD/TO/legacies/????) (Rewriting) von SamaelWinchester1234

I woke up in a dark alley with cuts and bruises all over my body. Where the hell am I ? and who am I ? then I remember. My name is jake and I am the waist of a space creature in earth by my siblings, classmets words My brother is the oldest first child, he's great at sports and decent at studies. He also very hot. My parents of course loves him and spoils him. My sister who's the middle child, Shes a big tiktoker and the popular girl in school. Of course my parents love her very much and spoil her much. she always bully me gets me in trouble and pulls bad pranks on me and makes nasty videos about me to humiliates me online. And then theres me the average little child. Everyone had high hopes for me but when they found out I had nothing special they forgot about me never cared for me nor spend time or money with me. They hated me. At school everyone made fun of me and bully me for being the unspecial unloved ugly weird kid out of my family. My brother and sister knows about it but never did anything. Currently as I was walking I got robbed by two people then beat me up and left me. I forced myself to stand as each of my body parts hurt like hell then I check my phone to see it was 1 am with no calls from anyone as expected. I started to limp forward crossing the road I hear a sound I look to my left to see a small thing coming at me. As it got closer I saw it was a truck before I can even dodge it hit me hard. Then everything fade to black.

Finding Purpose (+18) ✔️ von ZaynismRules

***this book contains suicidal thoughts and tendencies, may not be appropriate for younger audiences*** In which she looks for the purpose of life. Lily Carter's parents died in a car crash leaving her and Laura, girl was depressed long before her parents passed away and with all the problems turning up now, Lily felt more miserable - if that's even possible. With her journey to look for life's purpose and grab the small pinch of HOPE - which is ironically her second name -, will she finally snap at the pressure and finally end it all? or will a small light lit her darkened world of grief and loneliness? * "So you know. The little goth girl who gets bullied is indeed a mess. There's this mess in her head that eats her alive everyday isn't it? What to do now Kaden? Tell the whole neighborhood and recieve an award for taking out a crazy in this world?" I spit like vomit. His eyes warmed up as I finished, "Lily. It isn't like that" "What is it then? People stopped caring... they gave up, why aren't you?" I fought my tears. "Because I feel the need to care. Did Leigh hurt you? Did she hit you?" he finally noticed the unusual redness of my cheek. I don't like the way he told me he needed to care for me. I felt like an obligation, a responsibility that he is carrying and carrying leads to getting tired and when people gets tired, they give up. I don't want them to give up on me. But they will, so it's good not to make them care for me in the first place. "I never needed anyone. I stopped needing anyone before, why start now?" I uttered the words again. Why? There is nothing to fight for. No mama. No papa. No sister to love me. No one. So why would I waste my life and the time of others to fix what is already broken - and someone who doesn't want to be fixed? If I may add. Maybe I gave up. No, scratch that. I gave up a long time ago - when my parents died, my hope and purpose went away with them.

Secret Mind ✓ von sadlyish

"She's right! She's right! I don't cut in the right spot." My hold tightens on my wrist. The red blood oozes out of my wrist. I slide up and grab my bag and run out of the bathroom. I don't care if people can see the blood I just want to get out. I race for the doors and shove through people. I earn a lot of glares and glances that read "weirdo." I ignore and push. I run to my house and lock myself in my bathroom. I don't bother closing the front door cause I don't care if people come in to kill me. I grab my razor and cut deep cuts into my arm and wrists falling into a pool of my own blood. • • • Evangeline has a great life. Friends? Check! Good grades? Check! Loving family? Check! But what if she has secrets that nobody knows of? What if the only thing she can trust is her secret diary? What if slowly but surly she's dying inside? How can an innocent twelve year old deal with these problems? Will she keep on facing these problem till the day she breaks. Her school burns down forcing her into a different school to meet different people and she has to fit into a different lifestyle as well. Meet Evangeline. Now at 17 years of age in a new high school. Not all girls anymore. No uniform. Meet Drake. Your classic bad-boy. He just moved to Saint Abigail high school. He is assigned partners with the quiet, calm, unnoticed Evangeline. As time progresses he finds that she isn't as happy on the inside as she is on the outside. Can he save her? Or is it too late? • • • Some rude language. Depression and cutting. Don't say I didn't warn you. Okay, I wrote this at the start of this year (may 2016) and I had very poor writing skills. This book hasn't been edited and the whole idea is cliche so I wouldn't recommend you read it but I'm not stopping you, either. Read at your own risk. • • • Copyright © 2017 by -moonlust. All rights reserved.

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{EDITING PROCESS} BOOK ONE OF TWO When a high school student named Davina Smith faces her senior year after a tragedy in her family, suddenly finds herself appealed to the new kids in town. She never had an interest in befriending anyone besides her childhood friends Emma and Jackson, But these kids had something about them that just made them stick out. Maybe it wasint such a bad idea to expand her social life. What could go wrong? Right..? ~ Davina Smith, a 17 year old with trauma of losing those close to her from past experiences and losses, is soon appealed to the new kids in town. Or more like appealed to the attractive black haired, green eyed boy. She's never been the one to want to have a relationship. Is now the time? Xavier Witts, a 18 year old boy hiding a nothing more than a couple lies... or so he says. Xavier never wanted to get attached to someone he could lose. He never to wanted to go through that again. But what happens when suddenly that person fights against his measures of protection? What happens when that person is willing to risk their life just to be with him? Luckily he would do the same ~~~~~~ "I don't know what to do Xavier..." I cry uncontrollably into his chest as he holds onto me for dear life. "I know love. I know." "I'm such a bother to yall." I choke out. "I'm so fucking weak. I can't even defend myself." Xavier's arms unwrap from my body, and his hands hold my teary face. "I'm a worthless h-human." Xavier furrows his eyebrows in pain. A tear of his own falling down his face. "No," he says shaking his head. "No. You've never been a bother to me. You aren't weak. And you most certainly aren't worthless." I gasp to breathe, and he continues talking. "What you are is an amazing person who hasn't let all of this crazy bullshit affect her. You handled it like a champ. What you are is a strong, brave being that has stood by my side." I breathe as he leans closer. "What you are, is the love of my life...."