Forbidden Afflictions // Alfie Solomons Peaky Blinders
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- Parts 32
TRIGGER WARNING
Sequel to Forbidden Alliances.
"I'm hurting too! I lost my baby too!" he screamed in defense. "I am trying, Love. I am. It hurts, every day I wake up, right. It fucking hurts to 'ave to see you like this. It hurts, but I ain't sitting here feeling sorry for myself!"
"You don't get it," she said regretfully, shaking her head and backing away in disbelief. "I don't fucking care anymore, Alfie," she cried, deepening her voice as the tears glistened in her eyes. "I can't do it anymore. I'm too fucking tired..."
"So you're just gonna sit in that fucking windowsill for the rest of your miserable fucking life?! Cry and snivel at every passing carriage on the street? Cringe and flinch when I try to touch you?"
His words were like the dullest of knives. With each word, it was as if he were driving the blunt metal into her, ripping her rather than slicing her, tearing and torturing her with every enunciation.
"Why are you allowed to mourn but it's too fucking hard for you to let me?! Going to the courts, talking about what happened... Everyone walking down the street will know every gory detail of my own personal purgatory! That is mine! Mine! I'm not obligated to expose and defile what is mine for the whole world to see because of some false allegations against women I don't know and some dirty fucking dollar signs!"
"Wot's 'appened to you?" Alfie asked coldly, shaking his head and cringing at the sight of her. "Some fucking feminist, eh? Some selfless fucking activist."
"It was my baby, Alfie! My miscarriage! My hell! Mine! Not yours! Not theirs! Mine!"
"You can't keep using him as an excuse to sit here while the world spins 'round. You're not allowed to act like he is some fucking reason to just let the earth swallow you 'ole, becoz let me be the one to tell you right fucking now! Life ain't gonna stop moving forward for some bloody woman 'oo can't get over the fact that the things worth fightin' for are the most painful!"
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