Confessions of a Full-Figured Gal

A collection of short humorous pieces on subjects such as: the brassiere (Go Figure), songs containing the name Gloria (Gloria!), the relationship between Dr. Pepper and prune juice (Give Us This Day our Daily Fiber), and the ‘fifty shades’ phenomenon (Fifty Shades of Beige)

Quotes:
“Why do they call them minivans, anyway? What would a maxivan look like?” – Deep Thoughts of Mary Schwester

“Who needs a minimizer bra? Try this test: When you see a photo of yourself in a group of people, do you appear to be a large chest with a tiny little person following along behind? If so, you may benefit from a minimizer.” - Go Figure

“I put on a pair of pants with a loud pattern and asked my sister, “Do these make my rear end look big?” “No bigger than it actually is.” Boy, there's nothing like a sister to give it to you straight. But that's the best thing about being 200 pounds - you don't look any bigger than you actually are. So you needn't lose sleep over it.” – Ton of Fun

“It's not like we're not getting enough fiber at my house. We eat nuts in the form of Turkey Hill Tin Roof ice cream almost every night. Potato chips have fiber, too, don't they?” - Give Us This Day Our Daily Fiber