Stupid Ass Arthur

Arthur Morgan's life ain't been what you'd call normal. Hell, half the time, it barely made sense. Sure, he was a gunslinger, a horseman, an outlaw-whatever fancy words folks like to use. But mostly, he was a man with more bad ideas than good ones and just enough stubbornness to see 'em through.

This here autobiography? Well, it's less a story of triumph and more a collection of unfortunate decisions, told straight from the source. You'll read about Arthur's deeply held belief that his homemade "miracle elixir" could cure damn near anything-except, apparently, the violent stomach aches it caused. Or the time he swore up and down he could talk to animals, which mostly just resulted in him getting bit, kicked, or ignored.

Ever wonder what happens when you challenge a bounty hunter to a cartwheel contest instead of a shootout? Arthur did. It did not go well. And then there's his short-lived experiment in starin' directly into the sun to "absorb its power," which, unsurprisingly, made him real good at bumpin' into things for a while.

But underneath all the dumbassery, there's a man who meant well-loyal to the gang, good to his friends, and always willin' to go the extra mile (sometimes in the wrong direction) if he thought it'd help. Untold ain't just a book about an outlaw; it's about a fella who lived life the only way he knew how-full speed, half-thinkin', and usually covered in dust.

So saddle up, shake your head, and enjoy the ride. It's a hell of a lot safer readin' about it than livin' it.