Goodbye

Do you remember the day we first met ? It was long ago. You came up to me and asked me for help. I thought you were just mocking me but as it turned out, this was not the case at all.

I was not really good with people. I never really had any friends. How would you even define a friend ? We were friends, right ? Of course we were. We joked, we laughed but we did not kiss. A friend is a friend, not a lover. You did not want more, right ? I understood that. I accepted that. The thing is, at some point I just could not help it anymore. I fell in love with you. I know it sounds stupid and honestly, I feel pathetic. I'm worthless. Nothing will ever change that.

Will you listen to me ? Will you understand me ? Even if you do not, I will never turn my back on you and do you know why ? Because I love you. I love you. I love you so much it hurts. It's fine if you do not feel the same about me. Please, let me just cherish this warm feeling inside my chest.

//!Trigger warning: child abuse - sexual abuse - violence - sexual assault - suicide!//