The states! - Jim Gaffigan - Wattpad

Story cover for The states! by CalicoCrisis

The states!

Reads 6,524
Votes 65
Parts 30
Time 2h 6m

Reads 6,524
Votes 65
Parts 30
Time 2h 6m

Basically just Usa's States. Its uhhhhhhhh lil' skits. It DOES have some RusAme that Alaska did not sign up for. Annnd thats about it. I think I should rename this "America's Shits" or something like that

Haha, coming up with a better description. 
This has swearing (example: Alabama: Have you ever accidentally gotten into a relationship with your sister? Mississippi: bitch what), ships you probably won't like, also as I write this I slowly descend into insanity. IT'S VERY NOTICEABLE AND SOMETIMES I QUOTE THESE TO MY FRIENDS! (you should to 😉) Also there's Countries in this book. Like China, Russia, North Korea, Third Rice in the South Park bit and then (s)he never shows up again, UK, France.. I could go on and on, but it's only the countries Amurica (🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🚫💵🔫✅🗽🗽🗽) has interacted with. Also it has TONS of spelling mistakes and cringey 4 wall breaks. I might go back and fix my first 4 chapters. (PLEASE I BEG OF YOU START AT LIKE OOH YOURE IN TROUBLE FRjOM NEW MEXICO crap MAY NOT MAKE SENSE- BUT I LITERALLY CAN NOT HANDLE ANOTHER PERSON COMMENTING ON THE FIRST 4)

Now, onto the ranks


8 in Utah
10 in Alabama
9 in Alabama
5 in Alabama
2 in Idaho
282 in Australia
18 in amerus
437 in Australia
1 in New Mexico
1 in New Mexico (September 2023)
12 in Utah
7 in idaho
12 in Alaska
16 in Alaska
21 in Alabama
21 in Florida (October 2023)
22 in Ohio (August 2024)
63 in AlaskaAll Rights Reserved

Table of contents

30 parts

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[OLD] Escaping the Friendzone (Various! Hetalia x Reader) by sleepinwitherensmom

(School AU) (Y/n) (L/n) is a very smart young lady. She always gets good marks on her quizzes and tests. She's nice to everyone and tries to stay positive around her peers/friends/family. However, behind closed doors she tends to break down. She has an older sister with mental health issues and an older brother whom she used to confide in but he moved away and barely visited and talked to his family. This only made the girl's life worse. Her childhood friend and neighbor, Gilbert stopped talking to her as much when he started middle school, but she still hung out with Ludwig. Her mother was always stressed between being a single mom and dealing with her sister. So the girl used her studies and books as an escape method from the real world. Of course she had some friends, but not many really GOOD friends. NOTE: The reader has Situational Depression DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hetalia, the characters, art, or the au. I only own the plot and whatnot. And another issue is that there are a LOT of countries so I can't really do all of them, so the only characters falling for you will be: Francis Bonnefoy (France) Alfred F. Jones (America) Matthew Williams (Canada) Arthur Kirkland (England) Ludwig Beilschmidt (Germany) Gilbert Belischmidt (Prussia) Feliciano Vargas (Italy) Lovino Vargas (Romano) Antonio Fernandez Carriedo (Spain) Ivan Braginski (Russia) I suck at writing a fanfic with more than 10 characters involved unless I REALLY know ALL of the characters. Also I'm sorry I took out Japan and China. Before I started editing they got like zero attention and I felt bad Q_Q I hope you enjoy the story nonetheless and I thank you for taking your time reading this stupidly long description EDIT: If you want to see more interactions with a certain character (doesn't have to be ones you fall for) just let me know!

The Runaway - CountryHumans - AU by YonderBlue

-IF THIS BOOK IS SEEN ON ANYWHERE BUT WATTPAD, IT HAS BEEN STOLEN- 13 Colonies (America) has a great connection with his father, England. But when a sweet child becomes a rebellious teen who feels no one listens to him or understands what he's going through. His father is stricter with America and forces him to stay in the house, while his best friend USSR is fading away. USSR and his eldest son Russia want to find a cure but have to go into unknown waters. America (Having a close friendship with USSR and still being a teenager) wants to come and help, maybe even have his own land. But he'll have to leave his only home he's ever known, his father, his mother, and baby brother Canada. Will America leave? Will USSR die? Will England allow it? Where will they go? Will Russia be able to live without his father? How long will they be gone? "Where are these nightmares coming from?" Someone said. Started: May 12, 2020 Finished: April 3, 2021

Hetalia || Oneshots and Crackfic by AphTeavana

🎶Mamma mia... Here we go again... One, one, oneshots to feed ya Mamma mia, is this a good idea? My, my, how much I've missed this🎶 ᏟᎻᎪᏢᎢᎬᎡᏚ: 1.) Hideaway Monster AU, America Centric, Internalized Shame, Wendigo America, Vampire England, Minor Zombie France, Light Angst, 12 pages or 1723 words 2.) The Devil And The Singer - PruHun Human AU, Bar fic, Singer Hungary, Pinning Prussia, Good Pal Russia, 2 pages or 406 words 3.) A Note In My Locker - FrUk Highschool AU, Texting AU, Break up AU? 👀, Bad Touch Trio, Light Angst, Bromance ✊🏽😔, 35 pages or 3815 words 4.) Checkmate, Your Majesty Chesstalia AU, Nyotalia AU, White "King" France, White Queen Cuba, Black Queen America, Peace and War on the Planet Earth, Mentions of several characters, Some OCs, 35 pages or 4684 words 5.) It's Cold Outside - FrUk, SpaMano Christmasy AU, Human AU, Songfic? Maybe, There's a cafe, Owners Spain and Romano, SO MUCH GAY, 15 pages or 2140 words ᏔᎡᏆᎢᏆNᏩ & ᎡᎬᎪᎠᏆNᏩ: 1.) For small breaks in time(ex: hours/days/weeks) I use -'s but for long ones(ex: years) I use ~•~•~ 2.) Feel free to leave requests or constructive criticism in the comments or by PM! (And no, ship/character hate doesn't count) 3.) Currently on break ᎢᏔ: 1.) Sorry if you don't like cursing, I use it frequently! Besides that, I don't usually write any triggers 2.) If I do however decide to do so (or you feel I should add one) I'll label the chapter title with TW and put an A/N at the beginning 3.) If you do come across a chapter that contains content that is upsetting to you then PLEASE do not continue to read! Speed scroll to the bottom or use the scrubscroll to exit the chapter

Fifty-oneish || statehumans by LoreKreative

DISCLAIMER: I wrote this in 7th grade. Only read this is you like to suffer in 2023 countryhuman fandom. xoxo, k America has 51 (psychotic) children to take care of and the only other person that knows is his half, Confederate. He's constantly late to meetings and falls asleep at them. The other countries just assume that America is a fat, lazy bum who sits at home and plays video games all night, but what happens when a big problem occurs and America is forced introduce his states and Confederate to the others? #1 ohio (2/4) #1 csa (3/1) #1 onlyinohio (4/2) #1 fifty (4/24) #1 50states (5/17) #2 america (6/17) #1 states (12/31) #1 dixie (3/23/24) Started 1/2/23 Ended 5/21/23 It rlly took me five months to write this garbage 💀

America's little secret [1] by KirishimaArk

America, the missing personification of the world of nations. Finding out about the personification at a gala no less....... who would of guessed America had a personification, and a woman one at that. Imagine the surprise on the nations faces at finding out the World Superpower is a female personification! It isn't that woman don't exist but most thought it would be male! [So hi again, probably won't post this ever but if I do HI! I've been on a small writing craze along with reading craze about America not having a personification so why not join 'em? Also, this is basically a crossover between Countryhumans and Hetalia! Hetalia names belong to their creators unless mentioned, state names belong to me and Lectwist's! *This is a series story! Two more will be made unless I change my mind and make more! It's a trilogy currently. Book one: You are here! Book two: "America's little past [2]" Book three: -PENDING-* For those that like my OC Lectwist Island, she'll be in this story but less present as it'll focus more on America and the other countries instead of home. Also her and America didn't marry until the Great Depression here just so I don't confuse you (and myself) as I write this- *HEAVILY inspired by "Mother Amelia" cover art is mine! Sorry for this but I'm using Hetalia so be prepared for confusion if you don't know it! Sorry again-! 1st: Femamerica (October 12, 2024)]

Who Am I? {Countryhumans} [Sad RusAme Story] by mellonhead157

"Ame! Do you remember me?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It's winter time, and Christmas is right around the corner. America and Russia have been growing closer, and everyone "totally ships it", but there is one country who doesn't have the "hots" for their relationship. As America is being blackmailed and "taught a lesson", she finds herself, lost, and far, far away from home. Is the town she runs away to safe? Are the other countries really who they say they are? Will she be able to ever go back home? Most importantly, let's hope she doesn't forget anything... ‼️Disclaimer: I have NOTHING AGAINST any of the countries in this story that may be portrayed as "evil". It is simply for the story.‼️ ⚠️Also mild language warning⚠️ Also the cover is by me soooo yah.

cavities - a countryhumans one-shot book by wheezymichael

a sickeningly sweet one-shot book probably to be filled with amerus, but i can take requests for other ships this is for me to vent out and also just get my ideas on paper before they leave me. i don't do smut, only fluff and other stuff, hence the name. requests are open :) i'll try not to give much angst, because i too would like some fluff at times. #1 countryhumanrusame - july 4th, 2020 #3 countryhumansrusame - july 9th, 2020 #2 countryhumansships - august 30th, 2022 #1 shiponeshots - august 7th, 2020 #5 amerus - june 9th, 2022 #1 countryhumansoneshots - may 11th, 2021 #1 americaxjapan - april 16th, 2021 #1 amepan - april 16th, 2021 #3 gerpol - april 16th, 2021 #3 countryhumansrusger - april 16th, 2021 #1 countryhumansgerpol - june 2nd, 2021 #49 rusame - november 27th, 2021 #86 countryhumans - august 11th, 2022

Fading | CountryHumans America (Old) by _Some_Person_2

This is my first story ever so please do not judge 😅 and sorry if is not that good The other countries have always believed America was always a happy, cheerful , annoying country, that isn't responsible enough to do any. But what they don't know about him is that he has 50+ kids to take care of. America acts as if he was always ok and acts as if nothings was wrong. One day America woke up, and saw that his colors of the flag on him were fading into darker colors. While his eyes were turning black. Of course America couldn't let the other countries see him like this, so he covered his flag up with some face paint that he found and just put on his usual sunglasses to cover his eyes. Besides that, his states have been more energetic then ever, things have been going quite crazy with them around the house... But during all these crazy events, not only have things been getting wild, something quite unusual happens.. But what will happen when a certain country finds out that America's flag is turning to darker colors and his eyes are fading to black? What will happen if they find out that America has children? (Art cover is mine, not the best) (Oml this is so cringe-)

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Slide 1 of 8

[OLD] Escaping the Friendzone (Various! Hetalia x Reader) cover

The Runaway - CountryHumans - AU cover

Hetalia || Oneshots and Crackfic cover

Fifty-oneish || statehumans cover

America's little secret [1] cover

Who Am I? {Countryhumans} [Sad RusAme Story] cover

cavities - a countryhumans one-shot book cover

Fading | CountryHumans America (Old) cover

[OLD] Escaping the Friendzone (Various! Hetalia x Reader)

(School AU) (Y/n) (L/n) is a very smart young lady. She always gets good marks on her quizzes and tests. She's nice to everyone and tries to stay positive around her peers/friends/family. However, behind closed doors she tends to break down. She has an older sister with mental health issues and an older brother whom she used to confide in but he moved away and barely visited and talked to his family. This only made the girl's life worse. Her childhood friend and neighbor, Gilbert stopped talking to her as much when he started middle school, but she still hung out with Ludwig. Her mother was always stressed between being a single mom and dealing with her sister. So the girl used her studies and books as an escape method from the real world. Of course she had some friends, but not many really GOOD friends. NOTE: The reader has Situational Depression DISCLAIMER: I do not own Hetalia, the characters, art, or the au. I only own the plot and whatnot. And another issue is that there are a LOT of countries so I can't really do all of them, so the only characters falling for you will be: Francis Bonnefoy (France) Alfred F. Jones (America) Matthew Williams (Canada) Arthur Kirkland (England) Ludwig Beilschmidt (Germany) Gilbert Belischmidt (Prussia) Feliciano Vargas (Italy) Lovino Vargas (Romano) Antonio Fernandez Carriedo (Spain) Ivan Braginski (Russia) I suck at writing a fanfic with more than 10 characters involved unless I REALLY know ALL of the characters. Also I'm sorry I took out Japan and China. Before I started editing they got like zero attention and I felt bad Q_Q I hope you enjoy the story nonetheless and I thank you for taking your time reading this stupidly long description EDIT: If you want to see more interactions with a certain character (doesn't have to be ones you fall for) just let me know!