The states! - Jim Gaffigan - Wattpad

The states!

Reads 5,839
Votes 62
Parts 28
Time 2h 5m

Reads 5,839
Votes 62
Parts 28
Time 2h 5m

Basically just Usa's States. Its uhhhhhhhh lil' skits. It DOES have some RusAme that Alaska did not sign up for. Annnd thats about it. I think I should rename this "America's Shits" or something like that

Haha, coming up with a better description. 
This has swearing (example: Alabama: Have you ever accidentally gotten into a relationship with your sister? Mississippi: bitch what), ships you probably won't like, also as I write this I slowly descend into insanity. IT'S VERY NOTICEABLE AND SOMETIMES I QUOTE THESE TO MY FRIENDS! (you should to 😉) Also there's Countries in this book. Like China, Russia, North Korea, Third Rice in the South Park bit and then (s)he never shows up again, UK, France.. I could go on and on, but it's only the countries Amurica (🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🚫💵🔫✅🗽🗽🗽) has interacted with. Also it has TONS of spelling mistakes and cringey 4 wall breaks. I might go back and fix my first 4 chapters. (PLEASE I BEG OF YOU START AT LIKE OOH YOURE IN TROUBLE FROM NEW MEXICO crap MAY NOT MAKE SENSE- BUT I LITERALLY CAN NOT HANDLE ANOTHER PERSON COMMENTING ON THE FIRST 4)

Now, onto the ranks


8 in Utah
10 in Alabama
9 in Alabama
5 in Alabama
2 in Idaho
282 in Australia
18 in amerus
437 in Australia
1 in New Mexico
1 in New Mexico (September 2023)
12 in Utah
7 in idaho
12 in Alaska
16 in Alaska
21 in Alabama
21 in Florida (October 2023)
22 in Ohio (August 2024)All Rights Reserved

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28 parts

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Countryhumans Headcanons (and other stuff) by chroma_tea

My first book! I hardly have any idea what I'm doing I only publish on Wattpad and AO3, if you see this on any other site then it has been stolen Content warnings for the book: -Ships (Only like 3 CH ones- maybe more? they're barely mentioned) -Historical topics such as WWI, WW2, and others will be mentioned -Swearing. A fair amount. -Third Roach and other controversial characters/countries -Descriptions of things like injury, or other events may be mentioned -Also may be some crossover headcanons or headcanons from other fandoms but the main focus is Countryhumans Other than that, please enjoy this stupid book with random headcanons!

Who Am I? {Countryhumans} [Sad RusAme Story] by mellonhead157

"Ame! Do you remember me?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It's winter time, and Christmas is right around the corner. America and Russia have been growing closer, and everyone "totally ships it", but there is one country who doesn't have the "hots" for their relationship. As America is being blackmailed and "taught a lesson", she finds herself, lost, and far, far away from home. Is the town she runs away to safe? Are the other countries really who they say they are? Will she be able to ever go back home? Most importantly, let's hope she doesn't forget anything... ‼️Disclaimer: I have NOTHING AGAINST any of the countries in this story that may be portrayed as "evil". It is simply for the story.‼️ ⚠️Also mild language warning⚠️ Also the cover is by me soooo yah.

The Life's Gambit|Rusame|Countryhumans by Orcaleee

"Oh hey! Who are you? Are you guys an audience of my everyday entertainment? Glad to be here, I'm your producer, ███." "Get on with the description, stop spewing nonsense." "Brother, am I supposed to?" "You are supposed to do that, yet you fail miserably." "Oh, I'll get on with it then." America, an ████████, who's on Earth goes back to the kingdoms. He meets Russia, the Northern prince or the ███████ on his first day and bonded with each other. Within a couple days of knowing each other, they realized their mutual goal to fight for justice and freedom and goes on a rampage to return the spots of monarchs back to their rightful people. And yet, after so long, they don't know much of each other. Russia, however, has another goal on his mind, given by me! Yours truly, ███! "Ok Mr. Producer, get a move on, there's more to do than this." "Come on, you know I don't get too many chances to do this." "Half the description is literally redacted. Plus, you get to do this like nineteen more times, don't be greedy." "It's not my fault the audience physically can't understand me!" "I'm ending this for you." ----------------------------------------------------------------- Very not historically and geographically correct I KNOW THE PACING IS TERRIBLE 🧍 THERE WILL BE RUSAME AT SOME POINT Very much inspired by rr and wwms This is like if rr and wwms had a child except the child is dumb

America's little secret [1] by KirishimaArk

America, the missing personification of the world of nations. Finding out about the personification at a gala no less....... who would of guessed America had a personification, and a woman one at that. Imagine the surprise on the nations faces at finding out the World Superpower is a female personification! It isn't that woman don't exist but most thought it would be male! [So hi again, probably won't post this ever but if I do HI! I've been on a small writing craze along with reading craze about America not having a personification so why not join 'em? Also, this is basically a crossover between Countryhumans and Hetalia! Hetalia names belong to their creators unless mentioned, state names belong to me and Lectwist's! *This is a series story! Two more will be made unless I change my mind and make more! It's a trilogy currently. Book one: You are here! Book two: "America's little past [2]" Book three: -PENDING-* For those that like my OC Lectwist Island, she'll be in this story but less present as it'll focus more on America and the other countries instead of home. Also her and America didn't marry until the Great Depression here just so I don't confuse you (and myself) as I write this- *HEAVILY inspired by "Mother Amelia" cover art is mine! Sorry for this but I'm using Hetalia so be prepared for confusion if you don't know it! Sorry again-! 1st: Femamerica (October 12, 2024)]

Fading | CountryHumans America (Old) by _Some_Person_2

This is my first story ever so please do not judge 😅 and sorry if is not that good The other countries have always believed America was always a happy, cheerful , annoying country, that isn't responsible enough to do any. But what they don't know about him is that he has 50+ kids to take care of. America acts as if he was always ok and acts as if nothings was wrong. One day America woke up, and saw that his colors of the flag on him were fading into darker colors. While his eyes were turning black. Of course America couldn't let the other countries see him like this, so he covered his flag up with some face paint that he found and just put on his usual sunglasses to cover his eyes. Besides that, his states have been more energetic then ever, things have been going quite crazy with them around the house... But during all these crazy events, not only have things been getting wild, something quite unusual happens.. But what will happen when a certain country finds out that America's flag is turning to darker colors and his eyes are fading to black? What will happen if they find out that America has children? (Art cover is mine, not the best) (Oml this is so cringe-)

Breaking Away-CountryHumans United Kingdom by TheOldJazz

UK has been going through some tough times with Brexit and parliament and his kingdoms are becoming reckless and want to break free. No one knows about UK's condition apart from France so how will he be able to tell his sons that he will be gone soon and replaced? Will UK's problems bring back old enemies? I guess you'll have to read the book and find out... !Includes!: •Swearing •Fighting •Countryhumans (some shipping involved) •Biased opinions on history I wrote this book at a young, impressionable and stupid age. This has meant not all of this story is historically accurate, as above, some of the historically accurate parts may be biased to a certain opinion(e.g. when talking about past events a country will see it as bad or good, who was on the 'good side' and 'bad side' etc.) This story is fictional and not meant to offend anyone in anyway. Sorry if HC's seem to change in the book and the characters personality is everywhere, I don't quite have my own HC's on countries yet and am influenced on others HC's. (This is my first ever Wattpad story! So I'm very nervous and sorry if I make mistakes. I was inspired to write this story by mention of it and am not trying to copy anyone but please let me know if there are any problems, thank you!) !! If you're a reader/seeing this on another site that is not Wattpad, then my book most likely got copied and pasted onto an unsafe fanfiction app page. !! (Front cover was made by me. I used a reference photo but I couldn't find the original owner, sorry.)

cavities - a countryhumans one-shot book by wheezymichael

a sickeningly sweet one-shot book probably to be filled with amerus, but i can take requests for other ships this is for me to vent out and also just get my ideas on paper before they leave me. i don't do smut, only fluff and other stuff, hence the name. requests are open :) i'll try not to give much angst, because i too would like some fluff at times. #1 countryhumanrusame - july 4th, 2020 #3 countryhumansrusame - july 9th, 2020 #2 countryhumansships - august 30th, 2022 #1 shiponeshots - august 7th, 2020 #5 amerus - june 9th, 2022 #1 countryhumansoneshots - may 11th, 2021 #1 americaxjapan - april 16th, 2021 #1 amepan - april 16th, 2021 #3 gerpol - april 16th, 2021 #3 countryhumansrusger - april 16th, 2021 #1 countryhumansgerpol - june 2nd, 2021 #49 rusame - november 27th, 2021 #86 countryhumans - august 11th, 2022

sooo um... RusAme? - Fighting by Incognito7671

Description of story is at the bottom along with warnings. Okay so I was looking through my old stories that I wrote during school in 7th grade, and I came across this little RusAme excerpt... I want to kill myself after reading it but I think I'll clean it up because HO-LY sHiT- to whom it may concern: alright. so i know that these stories are old, but i've been reading some of them and i was disappointed that the ones i loved were either discontinued or gone for some other reason. so i decided that i am going to put all of my favorite aspects of this ship and make my own story. I AM NOT DEAD. I AM ACTIVE AS OF TODAY. DATE STARTED: May 16, 2022 DAY FINISHED: I WILL NOT GIVE UP ON THIS STORY. I AM STILL ACTIVE AND WRITING. America was a senior in high school, his long term rival being Russia. They never got along, but they wouldn't go and pick fights with each other just for the fun of it. In fact, America tried at all costs to avoid getting beaten up. He got enough of that from his father. That is until one day when his little brother, Australia, came to him for help with a bully. As it turns out, this bully was a little more dangerous than America came to think. He falls into a problem he doesn't think he can escape and with no one to tell or turn to, he doesn't think he ever will. When his parents don't come home and his situation goes from bad to worse, America may have to turn to the one he's sure he hates. Will he find the courage to ask for help, or will he decide life's not worth it and let go? =================================== |-!WARNING!-| =================================== This book contains the following: Self harm Suicidal thoughts Suicide attempts Death Rape Anymore triggers I think of will be added later.

Pessimistic Coodies (RusAme) by Toddels

The tall tale of the later hardships faced by "the gifted child". As Russia ages, he finds his life dulling because he has nothing to live for. He had already succeeded in so much that his life loses purpose. One fateful day he unexpectedly befriends America who understands exactly how he is feeling. He persuades Russia to partake in deadly events with him to help him feel excitement again. Intelligently gifted depressed psychopaths should never become addicted to danger... or become besties. 🦠🦠🦠 America glances back over to me with a menacing grin plastered onto his face. He laughs and its echo haunts my ears. "I don't think I'm insane; surely my entire situation is understandable. If it weren't, I would've been put into that asylum when I was younger." I stare into his doe mismatched colored eyes. What the hell did I get myself into? "America, you are insane." I repeat. I was truly at a loss for words and had conflicting emotions. Crossing the street blindfolded was the last thing I had expected him to try. And yet, I was even more disturbed at how much I wanted to try it for myself... "And so are you, Russia." he says chillingly as if he had a key to my gated mind. "We are not so different and you know it. You are not normal; you revealed that to me in your past. Our horrible childhoods molded us into what we are today. " "I'm not fucking crazy." I tell him, "I find hobbies to feel alive- not to try to kill myself!" 🦠🦠🦠 **Not the story you will be expecting** ⚠️ Warning: This is a fictional novel, so please don't attempt or copy anything life threatening that these characters do, thanks TuT 💗 All art is mine :) 🫧 - Yes, there are many allusions to famous works of literature because I am an obsessed fanatic for them!! Also I included a shit ton of symbolism and foreshadowing. So be on the look out for everything! ✨ ;)

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Slide 1 of 9

Countryhumans Headcanons (and other stuff) cover

Who Am I? {Countryhumans} [Sad RusAme Story] cover

The Life's Gambit|Rusame|Countryhumans cover

America's little secret [1] cover

Fading | CountryHumans America (Old) cover

Breaking Away-CountryHumans United Kingdom cover

cavities - a countryhumans one-shot book cover

sooo um... RusAme? - Fighting cover

Pessimistic Coodies (RusAme) cover

Countryhumans Headcanons (and other stuff)

My first book! I hardly have any idea what I'm doing I only publish on Wattpad and AO3, if you see this on any other site then it has been stolen Content warnings for the book: -Ships (Only like 3 CH ones- maybe more? they're barely mentioned) -Historical topics such as WWI, WW2, and others will be mentioned -Swearing. A fair amount. -Third Roach and other controversial characters/countries -Descriptions of things like injury, or other events may be mentioned -Also may be some crossover headcanons or headcanons from other fandoms but the main focus is Countryhumans Other than that, please enjoy this stupid book with random headcanons!