Our journey

Dear Mom,

For years I have vomited my feelings to you thinking that's how I felt.
Realizing that was anger, resentment, hurt and sadness I never realized that
I wasn't feeling those feelings and emotions I was vomiting over reacting to
all this hostility hurt and pain.I so badly wanted to have a secure
relationship with you,knowing all the things that happened all the betrayal
that I overlooked to have some sort of relationship with you mom. When
looking at you in that hospital bed it all hit me. I suppressed so much for
so many years felt afraid didn't know how I can face life without a mom at
such a young age I realized that I've been my own mom for a lot of years. I
would go to meetings act like a big shot talking about how when my mother
dies I will be free of all that anger hurt and pain and boy was I wrong. I
use too joke about it thought it was funny until the day that I met you at
West Hills Hospital February 2 reality hit me I had to do the right thing.