Not me. (2023) - here. - Wattpad

Story cover for Not me. (2023) by MineOnlyFriend2

Not me. (2023)

MineOnlyFriend2

Reads 2,041
Votes 125
Parts 91
Time 1h 13m

Reads 2,041
Votes 125
Parts 91
Time 1h 13m

MineOnlyFriend2

adhd angst darkthoughts depression disassociation eatingdisorders love maybejustalittlegay pain self selfharm selfhatred suicidalideas suicidalthoughts teen

so, I've been struggling for a long time now, and I never told anyone about it. I've never opened up. but I met someone who understands how I feel, and I'm beginning to feel again. I don't know how to do it, but I finally feel I can fight. I've been so exhausted. I'm not better, I'm not sure if i ever will be, but I'm not numb, not entirely. I can't say how I'm feeling, or what i am going to write, but if you want it, it's here. 

This is for you. 


For everyone who was made to be the villain by those meant to be by their sides.
For everyone with a sensitive heart made to grow strong much too quickly.
For everyone who struggles to get out of bed in the morning.
For everyone who never could find the words to say why. 
For everyone who struggles to feel and for everyone who feels too much.
For everyone who had to pick themselves back up.
For everyone who had to parent themselves.
For everyone fighting an invisible battle.
For everyone who has been underestimated.
For everyone who has to flee to other worlds to cope.
For everyone who found other means to silence their voices.
For everyone who was silenced.
For everyone who was over powered.
For everyone who was made to be less.
For everyone who had to watch someone else suffer and stay silent.
For everyone asking themselves, why?
Why would you do this?
What did I do?
Why is this happening to me?

It was never your fault.All Rights Reserved

adhd angst darkthoughts depression disassociation eatingdisorders love maybejustalittlegay pain self selfharm selfhatred suicidalideas suicidalthoughts teen

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91 parts

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lifieee.talks by lifieee

This isn't going to be a story. But just a safe place for all of us to share our problems 💘✨ As I begin posting you all will understand what this is going to be about 😌🐤 But I just wanted to say, anything that's been bothering you, drop it in my messages or in the comments (of any post) 💗😪 and I'll read them and make sure, I help you out as much as I can 🌷🌱 And then your problem will be created into a part of this series (Identities won't be revealed unless you want it to, ofcourse) 🐾🐥 I am just doing this because I know we all face tough times out there 🌊🐳 and I myself am no professional. But I always have loved talking. lol. So, why not put it to a good use and also I really don't give terrible solutions so, I figured this would be the best 💕 and also, guys I know a lot of us are afraid of being vulnerable but it is the most beautiful part of being human 🌈💨 A human has emotions, and they're intelligent enough to speak them ⏳👀 They're surrounded by people like their own and as dark as the world might be, humanity, love, empathy, compassion all of these positive things will never seize to exist 💜✨ So, as we go on adding stories to this series I hope it'll help you all out and it will heal us all in some way or the other 💘🕊 Thank you and right now, I won't be posting anything. So, if you have anything you'd like to share drop it in my inbox and I'll read it as soon as I'm free. - loads of love, xoxo - lifieee.

Nobody's girl by lovlylair46_2287

Iris is seventeen. She's quiet, she's tired, and she's used to being invisible. At school, the bullying never stops. At home, her mother barely notices she exists-unless it's to criticize her. There's no one to lean on, no safe place to land. And the pain she carries? It's not just in her mind. It's carved into her skin, buried under skipped meals, and hidden behind fake smiles. Every day, Iris wonders how much longer she can keep going. Then he shows up. Loud. Reckless. The kind of boy who doesn't care what anyone thinks. He's everything she isn't until, somehow, he notices her. Really sees her. But when your whole world has taught you you're nothing, what do you do with someone who suddenly wants to know everything?

Fml by hannah101gal

"Are you ok?" "What's wrong?" "Are you sad?" "Everything will be okay". Honestly, I'm not okay, what's wrong? Everything! And why am I sad? Because I can't handle anything anymore and NOTHING will be okay. I don't know why I always need to lie to everyone about me, it's not like they could understand anyways. Who's been by my side? Well people obviously, but none of them can know what I think! How I feel! How could they anyways, it's not like my life is a book that people can just read and understand... Who am I? An emotional girl who is exaggerating right now? Haha! NO. I'm actually Anne, and I'm fourteen. I guess that I'm a social teen, always looking happy and approchable. Well not lately...But you'll get to that part at some point. I'm an "average teen" like some people say. Well I honestly don't know. I'm always tired, depressed stressed, but some say that that's normal. Of course because my life isn't complicated at all...Maybe I imagine things? All these years and I've always kept things inside, of course I have friends, but they can't hear my thoughts and know everything in my pathetic life. So that's why I've decided "Well why not write in a diary? Maybe it will help? Or something" I have no idea if it actually helps, but it might...At least it's something I can open up to. To talk about my suicidal thoughts, my depression, my self-harm issues and my eating disorder... On that note.... Bye.... Fml :) Anne

INNER DEMONS by Rozuxx

They say life is full of surprises - but they never said some of them would break you beyond recognition. I wake up every day carrying a weight no one else can see. I laugh. I smile. I play the part. But deep inside, I'm unraveling - quietly, painfully. No one notices the war behind my eyes. The kind of pain that doesn't scream, it lingers - slow, quiet, deadly. I've forgotten what peace feels like. I only know how to survive... not live. "I'm okay." It's the lie I tell, because it's easier than explaining the emptiness. My inner demons whisper that I'm not enough. That I'll never be. And sometimes... I believe them. Sometimes, I feel like I'm already gone. But even in the darkness - even when I'm on the edge - there's still a voice, quiet and trembling, that says: "Hold on." This is a story for those who suffer in silence. For the ones fighting battles no one can see. For the broken, the tired, the ones still breathing - even when it hurts. You're not alone. And maybe... that's where hope begins.

It hurts....the emptiness [reborn as Rebekah Mikealson] by PennyMiller23

You know....when you first hear that fast beating heartbeat.... everything else melts away, the stress of finding out you're pregnant at 16, your boyfriend ghosting you after you showed him the test, your parents abandoning you when you need them most.....it all goes away and you finally found what you been looking for all along....unconditional love and that's exactly what I felt towards you my love...my sun flower...my baby......God gave me 2 years to be your mother and now the memories hurt......love I am so sorry mommies coming. Dani Winters was on her way home from her friends house, listening to her son talk random things when suddenly a car came out of nowhere and rammed the side of her car, she slowly opened her eyes only to groan out a gasp and tried to turn to check on Tommy.....only to let out an agonizing scream after and lost consciousness. The doctors tried to save her, she came back a few times but she didn't want to....she didn't want to live in a world without her son....they fought to bring her back....well she fought to stay dead, so what happens when the next time she wakes she's in a coffin wearing a 20s dress and having the most hungry inducing thirst.....and her only thought 'It hurts.' Warning this will have discussions about suicidal thoughts/actions, death of a child, depression, blood, gore, murder, etc⚠️⚠️⚠️

hollow souls by pearlescennnn

𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐂 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐈 is a mystery wrapped in darkness no one dares to unravel. Pain and sin have been etched into his skin, coursing through his veins like poison. Broken and battered more times than he can count, his soul carries silent scars few will ever see, scars born from horrors no one should survive. He was forged in cruelty, dragged through self-destruction and numbness, with death lurking just beyond his grasp since the moment his life slipped away. Salvation? He never wanted it. Sex was the only friend who stayed. 𝐋𝐘𝐑𝐀 𝐓𝐇𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐄 was once radiant, a bright light in a dark world, but now she's a hollow shell of numbness and despair. What stole her spark left her empty, drowning in a sea of pain she can barely swim through. The world feels distant, like something she watches through glass, untouched and untouchable. Desperate to feel anything, she turns to the bottle and the burn of her own scars. An angel's face with the devil's tongue, she's sin personified, broken beyond repair yet still unyielding. Their lives are raw wounds, bleeding into each other with every fight, every reckless touch. They destroy and salvage one another in a vicious cycle - he feels too much, and she feels nothing at all. Together, they are pain made flesh, sin made real, bound by a fierce, painful love that neither can escape. Can two hollow souls find salvation in each other, or are they doomed to break forever?

Built for the Storm: A Journey Through a Mind That Won't Sit Still by manishpandeyask

Sometimes, I feel like I was designed not to live - but just to survive. My brain doesn't crave joy, meaning, or legacy - it just tries to prevent crisis. It calculates food, money, safety. It panics. It runs. It hides. And somehow... it keeps missing life. I've spent years trying to understand why my mind behaves this way. Why it imagines catastrophes while standing still. Why it avoids the simplest task. Why it overthinks even brushing teeth, but can ride a cycle for 100 km in the rain without blinking. One day, when I was still, completely still... with no task to distract me... this strange feeling overtook me. The thought that maybe - just maybe - I am not supposed to design my own purpose. I looked up. And I said, silently: "God... if You made me this way... if You crafted this restless, impulsive, chaos-driven machine of a brain... then You must know where I fit. Use me. Don't let me rot in guilt and survival. Don't let me just float. You know this universe in ways I never can. You know every corner of it. So You must know the one place where this exact wiring of mine can become meaningful." This wasn't surrender from pain. It was surrender from trying to control something I've clearly never understood. I don't need peace. I don't need success. I need to be used. Fully. For something only this kind of life, this kind of mind, could contribute. If I am a tool, let me build something. If I am a flame, let me burn where light is needed. But don't keep me in the dark asking, "Why me?" Maybe I wasn't built to ask. I was built to be assigned.

Logan by braindeadwriter06

*TW* Contains topics and scenes of sexual assault, self-harm, abuse.* "You know you loved every second of it," I can feel the tears welling up as well as the anger building up within me. I stare at him for a while before I have to turn away from his hungry gaze. "Look I just came here to tell you that I forgive you for what you did back in Cali and I'll take you back," "You forgive me?" I yell. "I did nothing to you. You raped me! You fucking raped me! You have no right to come here and tell me that. You. Forgive. Me. You traumatized me. What you did to me tore me up inside and was eating away at me until I tried to kill myself. And when I told people they didn't believe me. I had to listen to so many people talk about how great a guy you were and how I clearly just regretted sleeping with you. You are a monster. You made me hate myself for something that was never my fault. You have caused me so much pain and suffering," I pause to take a deep breath. "So you don't get to come here to my school and tell me you forgive me. You don't get to make me feel bad about coming forward. The only thing I regret is ever thinking you were a good person." _____________________________________________ Logan Young is a 16-year-old girl about to start her senior year in a brand new town. The past year has been tough and her family moved to give her a fresh start. Her life before the move had been hard and she had been spiraling. She quickly makes new friends and even enemies. She builds up walls to protect herself. But what happens when an unlikely person helps her to tear down her walls and heal. Will she be able to survive in this new place and keep her secrets intact?

Red As Snow...(BWAM, Yakuza Romance, 18+) by Rachael_Abeauty

"Growing up, my mother always told me one thing; bad company corrupted good morals. I didn't believe her, didn't believe those words she'd always said to me with such conviction. I'd always thought myself strong, always thought myself good enough to corrupt those bad morals. That was until I crossed paths with a man so lethal, a man so utterly consumed with darkness. And gradually, his words of poison would lace my system, dilute my sanity and leave me begging at his feet for more..." It was hate at first sight... I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE IMAGES USED IN THIS BOOK. ALL CONTENT WITHIN THIS BOOK IS FICTIONAL AND WORKS OF MY IMAGINATION. ANY SIMILARITIES TO REAL-LIFE EVENTS, PLACES, PEOPLE etc IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL. MY BOOK IS NOT FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. COPYRIGHT ©️ 2023 by Rachael Abeauty! THIS BOOK CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT; DARK ROMANCE, SEXUAL SCENES, STRONG LANGUAGE, SELF-HARM, etc. BOOK COVER MADE BY ME, THE AUTHOR.

The Best Kept Secret! by writersosa

They say what's in the past keep it in the past but I wanted to know all about my past. It was things that I didn't know and that I wanted and needed to know! But my life turned upside down when my past is exactly what I should have left alone. Now if you ask me how it all began, I don't exactly remember but I know it started when I moved in with my grandma who I haven't met in all my twenty years of living. I have been in and out of foster homes since I can remember, living with families I knew nothing about. Being the outcast and them constantly asking me what's wrong because I simply did not speak. The only thing that kept me sane was my good grades throughout school. I got the satisfaction of doing the one thing that people kept telling me over and over I couldn't do. I stayed to myself and graduated high school with honors, getting a full-ride scholarship to any college of my choice. Of course, by having this accomplishment, it didn't make it any easier for me between my foster families. To them, I became the girl who was better than them. But I didn't care because when I turned twenty I finally got to start making my own choices. This is where I wonder if the first choice I made was the right one. The first choice I made was to go live off-campus with my grandmother during my first semester in college. I ask myself how could I be so stupid? But you will see just how stupid I was. Or was I?

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Slide 1 of 10

lifieee.talks cover

Nobody's girl cover

INNER DEMONS cover

It hurts....the emptiness [reborn as Rebekah Mikealson] cover

hollow souls cover

Built for the Storm: A Journey Through a Mind That Won't Sit Still cover

Red As Snow...(BWAM, Yakuza Romance, 18+) cover

The Best Kept Secret! cover

lifieee.talks

This isn't going to be a story. But just a safe place for all of us to share our problems 💘✨ As I begin posting you all will understand what this is going to be about 😌🐤 But I just wanted to say, anything that's been bothering you, drop it in my messages or in the comments (of any post) 💗😪 and I'll read them and make sure, I help you out as much as I can 🌷🌱 And then your problem will be created into a part of this series (Identities won't be revealed unless you want it to, ofcourse) 🐾🐥 I am just doing this because I know we all face tough times out there 🌊🐳 and I myself am no professional. But I always have loved talking. lol. So, why not put it to a good use and also I really don't give terrible solutions so, I figured this would be the best 💕 and also, guys I know a lot of us are afraid of being vulnerable but it is the most beautiful part of being human 🌈💨 A human has emotions, and they're intelligent enough to speak them ⏳👀 They're surrounded by people like their own and as dark as the world might be, humanity, love, empathy, compassion all of these positive things will never seize to exist 💜✨ So, as we go on adding stories to this series I hope it'll help you all out and it will heal us all in some way or the other 💘🕊 Thank you and right now, I won't be posting anything. So, if you have anything you'd like to share drop it in my inbox and I'll read it as soon as I'm free. - loads of love, xoxo - lifieee.