Explore what it means to be a teenager in our current society through the eyes of a boy who simply wants to be happy.
Living on the other side of 'Pretty Privilege', going against the standard of male beauty, and struggling with daily doubts about his intimacy is not an easy feat, especially when your sexuality is constantly questioned by family, 'friends', and even strangers.
In this book, I delve into my sexuality, reflecting on topics such as sex, self-esteem, self-confidence, my relationship with my parents, my experience with school bullying, loneliness, and above all, the desire to be loved.
I share my experiences, mistakes, and the things that have shaped me the most, all in a style inspired by Carrie Bradshaw from 'Sex and the City'.
Every day is different, and there is always a new question. The challenge lies in finding the answers to each one. How do we find the answers to each one? What am I doing wrong? Why was I born this way?
And the process of losing yourself, finding who you truly are, and not being a disappointment to myself, specifically, while being proud of myself.
This is my diary, a feverish journey of self-discovery and living under the pressure of your surroundings.
✦ New chapter every Friday! ☪︎
I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?