Whhaaaatttt???!!!

It was a normal day in the city of Chicago. I had two pockets full of smiley turds. You know, the tattoos. Cause, if I had real turds in my pockets, I would be considered weird. Which I may or may not be.

I walked up the three steps. It felt like four. Just then, the nerdiest kid at my school, Jakaj Hruff, who aka is a girl, walked up my porch, put her second and third finger on my temple and said, "Our energies convert."

I think quickly, but not wisely. I punch her hard in the face. I watch helplessly as blood drips down from her nose and onto the sidewalk.

"Sorry!" I yell as she runs away screaming in German. I'm guessing she was swearing at me. I didn't like her anyway.

I walk into my apartment. I slip on soap. Then, I blacked out.

I wake up in a pool of blood. I watch as my roommate Alex, walks towards me with a hatchet. I take a deep breath. He swings his hatchet up, then down at my head.

I wake up again with a bag of peanuts. Yay! I look inside... It's empty. "No!"