She was a tender heart,
Until she got hurt,
People they broke her,
And battered her soul,
She suffered from depression,
And anxiety too,
Wasn't quite suicidal,
At least no one knew,
She didn't try to kill herself,
But she didn't care to die,
She stopped looking at street signs,
And stopped caring about her life,
Eating and sleeping,
No longer required,
At least not until,
Her body would expire,
Make her pass out,
At 5 in the morning,
Then she'd wake again,
Continuing the torture,
She stopped paying attention,
To how deep she cut,
Hoping one day,
Might end the rut,
That she was stuck in,
And couldn't escape,
It's hard to seek help,
When you can't see straight,
People confuse her,
"We need you" they say,
But she knew in her heart,
The lies that remain,
Sliding from their lips,
Taking shape of a blade,
Cutting they say,
Is bad for your health,
But those wounds she makes,
Are only on her skin,
While the scars they leave,
Are imbedded within,
Deep to her core,
She'll never forget,
[BWWM]
I was only twelve years old when the world turned cold. The day my mom died in that car accident, I felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over my heart.
My dad, who had always been my hero, suddenly became a stranger, filled with rage and blame. He couldn't see that I was hurting, too; he only saw me as a reminder of his loss.
The accusations cut deep. He said it was my fault for being there, for not doing something to save her. For being the reason she was in the car in the first place.
In the years that followed, things only got worse. The abuse started gradually-a harsh word here, a shove there-but it escalated, leaving scars that I carried long after the physical pain faded.
I was drowning in my own despair, struggling to keep my head above water while my father's anger raged like a storm around me.
I only had a break from his anger when I started living with Aunt Dina-my mom's older sister. Well, that was because she found me nearly dead on my bed after I took a dozen pills. I was tired of living.
I had hit rock bottom.
The harsh whispers that followed me around and the stares at school. I pretended not to notice, like it didn't bother me. But it did. I was alone.
Then came Athalia, a ray of sunshine cutting through my darkness. With her, I felt something I hadn't felt in years-happiness.
She became my light through the darkness and my lifeline.
•••••••••••
● Warnings ⚠️
~ Mention of suicide
~ Anxiety attacks
~ Rape attempt
~ Mention of self-harm
~ Depression