HER
  • Reads 163
  • Votes 13
  • Parts 13
  • Time 11m
  • Reads 163
  • Votes 13
  • Parts 13
  • Time 11m
Ongoing, First published Oct 11, 2023
I dedicated this to the love of my life. I titled this, 'HER' because it Is her, who I fell in love with. It is her, who makes everything better. It is her, who always sees the perfection of my flaws. And it is her, who's always been there for me, and never left no matter how hard the circumstances are. I hope she knows how much I love her and how she means the world to me <33
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You used to be stronger than this. You used to thrive off being alone. You promised you would never let yourself depend on another human ever again. You're supposed to be a strong and independent woman who only relies on herself because that's the only person she can trust. What happened to you? Jackson. Jackson happened to me. Jackson begged me to let him take care of me. Jackson snuck in when I wasn't looking and found himself a home in this fucked up brain of mine. He set up camp among my thoughts and now he refuses to leave. He tangled himself in my synapses. He weaved his way into every aspect of my being. And now not a single part of me exists without some part of him in it. I have become the woman I promised myself that I would never be. I have become the woman who can't go one day without her husband's hands on her body. I have become the woman who looks for him in every room she enters, even if she knows he won't be there. I have become the woman who relies on her husband to be her barometer for all situations. I have become the woman who craves- no, needs her husband's approval in every endeavor that she encounters. I have become a woman I hate, a woman I used to make fun of, a woman who is useless without her husband. I broke my rules for him. - - - The usual strong, put-together, badass Jet is nowhere to be found right now. No. This is angry. This is hurt. This is desperate. This is crimson blood dripping from the blade of the dagger she used to kill the happy little kid in her. That's the thing about Jet. She wears strength and darkness equally well. She always has. It's like she's half goddess and half Hell. Half angel and half demon. She gave me peace in a lifetime of war. She's madness sipping chaos from a cup, and, fuck, does she make it look good. You think she's a delicate flower that you could step all over? You think you can break her soul that easily? Ha. You couldn't be any more wrong. She's wildfire and she will devour you whole.
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𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 - 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞. 𝐒𝐨𝐟𝐭, 𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞, 𝐁𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬. 𝐇𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 "𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒" 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐆𝐫𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐃𝐨𝐧𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐧 𝐅𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧. 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒. 𝐁𝐨𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞. 𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐧𝐨 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐞𝐫. 𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐞𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐑𝐘 𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰 𝐧𝐨 𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐑𝐨𝐬𝐞? 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝 '𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒' 𝐭𝐨 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐣𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐕𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐑𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤.
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I was ruthless and she was was wrecked by her past. I never thought twice of anything but I did of her. I wanted her but she was too scared to need me or was it the other way around? A hunger, so deep-engrossing me like madness....I could almost call that feeling love but would she ever love me? There's only one thing for sure. Its either I have her or loose me but what will staying me be without her? My life,my story,my tale. This was how I learnt to love.