My husband and I had a pretty good relationship. When his sexual performance in bed started to wane, he allowed me to take a male lover. He never tried to interfere while my love and I were having sexy fun; he would simply move into another room or live in the basement. Yet, he would find it hard to let our children or any of his family relatives know I had a lover. We therefore had to make sure that our lovemaking in our marital room would occur when our kids were fast asleep. Similarly, my lover's visits and stays in our home should be kept discreet and very often unknown to my husband's relatives. It was OK at first but then as my relationship with my love has gone through its first two years and would probably last much longer, I started to have feelings of embarrassment and shared my concern with my husband but he has kept to the same attitude.