Infatuation developed into something..

Today might be the 6th or 7th month since the last time I wrote here.
Infatuation developed into something new, something better? I thought that after my vacation everything would fall away, but it went the other way around. Infatuation developed into something I did not expect. I know that I am not her type of guy, but I am always expecting that at least 1-2% that she would like me in any way.
Every moment of going home with you is always a memory of mine, I always thought that these 30 minutes of going home with you would continue, I would pray sometimes that the train would stop so I could extend that short span of minutes with you.
Big brother and mentor - I looked like this to you, how I wish you could call me by my name and not the big brother that you always call me. It crushes my heart every morning I hear gossip about those other nationality dreams and future husband and dream boy thing.
It is really hard to hide what I felt for you, I promise that I will try to continue to hide from this, I promise that I will take care first of my current situation and not be unfair with what I am feeling right now. I think I am in love with you, infatuation develops into love for 6-7 months?
I always thought about you, every morning when I woke up and before going to sleep I always thought of you. Yes, it was always you on my mind. I care about you all the time, and I will risk what is my current situation and eventually, you will know and read about this.