Finding myself
  • Reads 14,271
  • Votes 279
  • Parts 36
  • Time 3h 33m
  • Reads 14,271
  • Votes 279
  • Parts 36
  • Time 3h 33m
Ongoing, First published Dec 19, 2023
Tana, the goddess of fire. Fits my past self perfectly. Now, not so much, I used to light my "victims", if you will, on fire, but now I like to watch the pain on their faces. The same pain they inflicted on little girls before. The same pain they didn't seem to care about when they ruined others' lives. 

It's been a month since my last assassination, and a lot has happened. Starting from chapter one to the last, twists and turns, keep attacking me when I'm just feeling even slightly comfortable. 

My new brothers, my new house, my new father who has been trying so hard to make up for the past 13 years he's lost. But can they change my perspective of life and help me find myself the way I haven't been able to for my past 16 years of life? 

I've always been Marianne Thibaut but will I be able to identify with the Marianne Bernard I was always supposed to be?

(the story does not break the fourth wall this is just the description) 

This is a lost mafia princess story.

7th in badgirl 1/6/2024
1 in 16-year-old 2/18/2024 🥇
7th in hit
9th in badass
3rd in knives 🥉
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𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭| 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 |𝟏𝟖+ by Psycho_xbabyx
67 parts Ongoing Mature
**𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐳** Panic surges through me, and before I know it, I'm turning on my heel, trying to run, to escape the impending punishment. I barely make it a few steps before I feel his hand clamp down on my hair, yanking me back with terrifying force. "Going somewhere, little girl?" "P-please let g- ahh! Please! H-Hurts me!" "Afraid, are we now, baby?" His voice is a snarl now, filled with fury. "L-leave m-me," tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. I'm scared of him, scared of what he'll do to my friend, scared of what he'll do to me. His grip on my hair tightens and I wince, choking back a sob. "Oh, why? Don't you like my hands on you, baby?" He mocks hurt that instantly turns back into anger. "But you were fine when that fucker touched you, ain't that right?" Then he pulls a silver knife out of his suit, twirling it lazily between his ink-covered knuckles and my blood freezes at the sight of that psychotic grin. ***** People quaked with fear at the sound of his name and me along with them. He was Demetrios 'the God' Nikolayev and he was first in command of Russian mafia. He was a true psychopath who enjoyed hurting people, and I hated him for that. The worst thing - he owned me. "Try to accept the darkness, because from now on, it will be your only light." I tried so hard, but I couldn't understand it back then. How possibly can darkness be light? ***** This is not a vanilla romance but a dark, toxic, perverted, obsessive story. The book contains mature themes such as foul language, bdsm, sexual and abusive content, kinks, blood, manipulation, etc. Please keep that in mind.
Double Down (a double standards series) Dark Romance (Part 7) by nikkihershell
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I didn't ask to be born into this world, none of us did but we make the best of it. I'm a twenty-five year old single man. Why you may ask? Because I've seen what love can do to a person. It can destroy them. My parent's are amazing but I can still remember the time's my father threatened to kill my mother, left us due to his mental illness. Besides who needs one main women when I can have a different one under me every night, money to blow and fast cars. I'm just enjoying my time until I take my Papes place at the throne. Most nights are spent living it up with my cousins who are my only friends. However there is the one girl that has caught my eye and I don't know why. I first spotted her at a random coffee house I stepped into. Usually I'm very talkative especially when I'm trying to snag a chic but I couldn't utter a word to her. I barely managed to place my order. Now, I find myself going out of my way to stop by that coffee shop everyday. It doesn't matter that it's out of my way. The only thing that matters is that I see her. I knew I could take her if I really wanted to but I can't make myself to do it. She sees me enter and shoots me that amazing smile and prepares my order without even asking what I want, she knows. She'll offer a greeting but all I can do is nod my head. She makes me lose my word's. Deep in my mind I wonder if she could be the one that could change my mind on love and that scares me. For now I'm satisfied at seeing her for the few minutes it takes to get my coffee. Besides I'm a killer, a future mob king and she's this delicate flower that wouldn't understand my world. It's best to cut my loses and move on. If only I knew her name..
Tried For Error by CBNellnebach
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"Previously known as... Scarletstroke: Girl assassin" * No hesitation * No killing of children * No killing of innocent people * No emotions * And defenitely, NO falling in love ~ Those are the main rules code named Scarletstroke, former assassin Scarlett Gonzales lives by. She is a highly-trained, highly-precise and highly-dangerous killer who considers herself the same as any other businesswoman, doing 'just her job' and convincing herself that she is dealing with 'just her target' rather than a person. She succeeds in contract killing better than any known assassin that ever existed and successfully ignores all feelings or emotions, knowing that they tend to make the "job" not go as planned. So when a new contract comes in and the mark is a certain gang leader that caught Scarlett's eye, she couldn't resist venturing deeper into a world filled with illegal activities on a personal mission to find out why he has a price on his head. Although, what she finds in that world isn't quite what she expected. Now, torn between duty and passion, Scarlett must decide if she pulls the trigger or if she becomes the target herself? Who knows, maybe he might be the answer to her deepest desires. Because her next target: Cayden Carlisle. +++ The culprit took in a deep, calming breath. "You may as well shoot me now, but just know that I am still going to kiss you." By the time he grabbed her waist with one hand and her wrist, connecting to the hand holding the gun, with the other... she was lost. Completely gone. She never stood a chance. His smell, his mouth, his soft growling noises. They were more than enough to disarm her. "I finally figured something out about you." He whispered, pulling her closer, trying to meld every part of her to him. "You display all your emotions through body language. In this case, your hand is betraying your mask." Every word of his was chosen for maximum impact. No wasted syllables, no extra breaths. Just facts.
Scars and Secrets of Our Enemies by DandelionDust_
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I wrote this story a while back and only recently decided it re publish it. It has a mostly complete ending, the storyline hangs a little but you get the idea and all, I just got so exhausted and couldn't finish so I'm sorry for the bad grammar and incompletion. ❤️ ** "Out of all the absurd things I've heard humans say about love these have to be the most ridiculous; I've heard people say love is why we die, some part of me thought that that was absurd the other part knew it was true, that's why the only thing in this world I really care for is hate . The second one, is that is you love someone you don't give up, till death due us part, bullshit right," I never believed either of those things until I met him, he made me want to give up and keep fighting at the same time. ** This enemies to allies to lovers story follows the head of the Italian mafia, a woman, Ravenna Daniela Moretti, but nobody knows that, they all know her as Sovrana della morte, meaning ruler of death, she has made it a crucial point to hide her identity, not even the close circle of mafia know her, until her identity as well as very important information is at risk when the 4 inner mafia circle are hacked by a group of Russian hackers, she is forced to team up with the 3 other dons of mafia, America, France and Spain she reveals her identity to them. Only to have the head of the French mafia realize that he was given stripper a few nights ago when Ravenna was undercover, they now have to pretend nothing happened and ignore their undeniable attraction as well as 6 years of burning hatred in order to defeat a bigger problem.
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Highest ranking: #1 in action First in Mafia series. As I felt the chloroform pressed against my mouth I kicked back, sending the guy flying to the floor. "Michael," I yell, pulling on his arm, "you gotta get up, ok?" Reluctantly, he begins to run with me into the Forrest. I pull him quickly as he recovers from the fall, despite feeling drowsy from the chloroform. The man must have recovered by now and chances are he's gaining on us at lightning speed. I feel Michael catch himself under his feet and speed up having recovered from the fall. He looks to me, "Split up?" I nod knowing exactly what he's thinking. There's only one of him and two of us, he can't take us both out. Just as we approach the lake, we split, confusing the man. He had stopped and was watching us both run away, probably evaluating which one of us he had a better chance with. I turn back to look where I'm going when I hear a loud bang. I scream. Pain flares up in my lower leg as though something bit me. The bullet ripped through my leg but stopped as I clearly have no exit wound. Expecting the man to have almost caught up with me, I look up only to see his back as he runs after Michael. *** 18 year old Blaze is kidnapped and taken from her home town along with her best friend Michael. When she gets there she easily assumes what they could want from her. Drugs, sex, money? But what if, it's something more? Something that never crossed Blaze's mind? When Blaze's past catches up with her how will she react to the old faces on new people? and when her two lives cross, will she be able to save the ones she loves, or will they end up like everyone else she cared about? First in the Mafia series. Started: 31st March 2016 Completed: 19 June 2016
Mio Re (#3) by reetilicious
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𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭| 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 |𝟏𝟖+ cover
Double Down (a double standards series) Dark Romance (Part 7) cover
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Stepmom - Scarlett Johansson ✔️ cover
Scars and Secrets of Our Enemies cover
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The Black Rose cover
Mio Re (#3) cover

𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭| 𝐃𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞 |𝟏𝟖+

67 parts Ongoing Mature

**𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐚 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐳** Panic surges through me, and before I know it, I'm turning on my heel, trying to run, to escape the impending punishment. I barely make it a few steps before I feel his hand clamp down on my hair, yanking me back with terrifying force. "Going somewhere, little girl?" "P-please let g- ahh! Please! H-Hurts me!" "Afraid, are we now, baby?" His voice is a snarl now, filled with fury. "L-leave m-me," tears sting my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall. I'm scared of him, scared of what he'll do to my friend, scared of what he'll do to me. His grip on my hair tightens and I wince, choking back a sob. "Oh, why? Don't you like my hands on you, baby?" He mocks hurt that instantly turns back into anger. "But you were fine when that fucker touched you, ain't that right?" Then he pulls a silver knife out of his suit, twirling it lazily between his ink-covered knuckles and my blood freezes at the sight of that psychotic grin. ***** People quaked with fear at the sound of his name and me along with them. He was Demetrios 'the God' Nikolayev and he was first in command of Russian mafia. He was a true psychopath who enjoyed hurting people, and I hated him for that. The worst thing - he owned me. "Try to accept the darkness, because from now on, it will be your only light." I tried so hard, but I couldn't understand it back then. How possibly can darkness be light? ***** This is not a vanilla romance but a dark, toxic, perverted, obsessive story. The book contains mature themes such as foul language, bdsm, sexual and abusive content, kinks, blood, manipulation, etc. Please keep that in mind.