I Will Never Stop Trying to Get Away From You - Narcissistic Trauma Story/Rant

I Will Never Stop Trying to Get Away From You - Narcissistic Trauma Story/Rant

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WpMetadataReadComplete Fri, Jan 19, 202415m
Rant part two because I need therapy and letting my trauma rot inside by brain is not helpful. This is about my previous friendship with a girl I see every day at school. She completely wrecked my brain function and now gives me flashbacks to the awesome trauma she gave me... everything she opens her fake, insecure and self-righteous mouth. I desperately want to get on with my life now that I've grown into a better, more secure person but she is still stuck in the same places as me because she's run out of people and places to haunt. If you found any of my story to be interesting, you might like one of my two Spotify playlists that I've made about my special someone: 'she's toxic but you used to like her' and 'screw the toxic girl - tell karma I said hi'. The two have very different vibes but are still vibes, nonetheless. I hope you don't relate to them. <3 Disclaimer: I am not a therapist or expert in Narcissist abuse. I simply know about it and want to speak out about my experience with a narcissist because it hurts like hell and I need to rant about it to help me and possibly someone else who went through something similar. Slight swears ahead.
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They say what's in the past keep it in the past but I wanted to know all about my past. It was things that I didn't know and that I wanted and needed to know! But my life turned upside down when my past is exactly what I should have left alone. Now if you ask me how it all began, I don't exactly remember but I know it started when I moved in with my grandma who I haven't met in all my twenty years of living. I have been in and out of foster homes since I can remember, living with families I knew nothing about. Being the outcast and them constantly asking me what's wrong because I simply did not speak. The only thing that kept me sane was my good grades throughout school. I got the satisfaction of doing the one thing that people kept telling me over and over I couldn't do. I stayed to myself and graduated high school with honors, getting a full-ride scholarship to any college of my choice. Of course, by having this accomplishment, it didn't make it any easier for me between my foster families. To them, I became the girl who was better than them. But I didn't care because when I turned twenty I finally got to start making my own choices. This is where I wonder if the first choice I made was the right one. The first choice I made was to go live off-campus with my grandmother during my first semester in college. I ask myself how could I be so stupid? But you will see just how stupid I was. Or was I?

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