To My Future Self (And The Boy I Used To Love)

Thirteen year old Kim Seungmin begins writing letters to his future self, thanks to a 7th grade school project. At first the letters are little heads up's to himself, small messages to one day let him know what being young was like.

That is, until he meets fourteen your old Lee Minho.

Immediately annoyed by the boy, Seungmin spends nearly every letter ranting about how much he hates, likes, and soon, loves him.

Until one day, Minho leaves.

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"Everything that he does is . . . different.

And at first, I totally thought he was weird. I thought that no soon-to-be man in there right mind could ever waste their time painting there nails blue or drawing little faces at the bottom of their ballet slippers "because it's cute".

But now, somehow . . . I find myself envying him. Wishing that I didn't spend my time praying on silly things like the shape of my skull or the curve of my legs.

And I can't help but wonder how he does it. How he ignores every part of society that tells hims to stop being the way he is, to stop being like a girl. And even now that I've seen myself write those exact words three times now, I've begun to wonder weather it's even me saying it or the voice in my head. The voice that mocks the tones of every other person in my life that has told me the same things I find myself saying about Minho.

Maybe being the way he is isn't so weird. Maybe being like a girl is better. Maybe being a man sucks balls. I don't know. But whatever it is . . . I guess I just hope I'll find out before I'm old and its too late. But you'd probably know if that happens or not. Hopefully.

Please don't prove me wrong,

- Kim Seungmin."

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(This book is also available on AO3, under the same name)