Being void of emotions doesn't mean having no emotions. It's pretending you're okay until you almost believe it. Until you don't remember how it felt before. Until numb becomes a personality. Until someone says "Are you okay?" and you almost start crying because no one's asked in months. And when someone finally reaches in - when someone finally cares - you want to run. Because hope is more terrifying than pain. Because being saved means admitting you need saving. Because the void tells you: they'll leave too. The worst part of the void isn't being alone. It's remembering what it felt like not to be. I wish I had never met him. Kilian was the one who took me out the void. Now that he's gone. What do I do? The void is calling it's dragging me back into it's dark cold infinite walls...what do I do Kilian?
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