Shattered.

They found her in a pool of blood on her front porch. The time I wanted to scream, let out my anger. I was in a parked car, on Donner street. With a completely inconsolable mother, and a face marked red with anger, grief and terror. These were the worst ten minutes i have ever had in my life. This was my first time grieving.

Death was never a fear of mine until i was 11 years old. The day she died. I never ever wanted to make anyone cry and seeing what death had done to my mother, from this point on i wanted to be immortal.
I crunched through the leaves and ran up the two sets of stairs and into the house. Throwing my bag down on the antique couch in the living room i swiftly ran up the stairs to get to my room. I peeled off my homeroom sweatshirt, kicked off my nikes and sat down on my bed and cried. I then went back down to see mum. I opened the living room door and stood a metre away from her. She laid there as i stood looking at her, face to corpse. My lips were locked together by the shear of antipathy and i felt strange i felt frigid, numb and cold to the touch. How was this possible? How could God let such a thing happen?! My eyes attempted to avoid her but i couldnt. Each time i looked at her frail, lifeless body i was reminded of the moments we had shared together. She was my mum, she was the only person that was a part of my life. She took care of me when dad abandoned us and now... she was gone aswell. Deep inside, i felt broken and a piece of me was raging with anger and fear. I felt detached, abandoned and isolated after all i was now an orphan.