Story cover for Why am I broken? by libertypearce
Why am I broken?
libertypearce
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libertypearce
Ongoing, First published Apr 18, 2024
emotionaltransparencyidentityrevelationinnerstrugglesintrospectionjourneylifechroniclepersonalnarrativepsychologicalunveilingreflectivewritingresilienceselfdiscovery
An inner monologue of my darkest moments and self discovery.

Despite trying to ignore my never ending inner monologue I find myself once again writing down my thoughts carefully choosing each word with some twisted and confusing .... that this may be the book that I actually finish but also knowing that I've done this four times already, from make believe worlds I tried to escape into, to the digital book of shadows tracking my gained knowledge of which craft and spirituality, and yet this is different. I sit here knowing that if anyone ever does ever read this they are about to bear witness to the unpicking of my past and my mind, they will soon know me better than I know myself in this moment, yet there is no shame or apprehension but simply acceptance of my current position and a vague and blurry hope. So here it is, with all it's stupid and painful details, and as I go through the time line of my life so far maybe I'll just understand myself or maybe it will no longer matter and I'll just be happy.
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emotionaltransparencyidentityrevelationinnerstrugglesintrospectionjourneylifechroniclepersonalnarrativepsychologicalunveilingreflectivewritingresilienceselfdiscovery
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In Love With Blindfolds On

85 parts Complete

I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?

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