Love or Lies (On Going)

Love adds color to our life they say... Pero bakit sa akin parang color black lang lahat? Lahat ba ng minahal ko mali? Does it mean, the man who could add color to my life wasn't born yet? Oh my! Kelan ko pa sya makikilala pag matanda na ko?
My first boyfriend cheated on me. He was my first love. I was so ignorant back then. Akala ko lahat ng sinasabi nya dapat ko paniwalaan. He's so sweet, caring and so loving... Sa sobrang loving nya, pati kaibigan ko minahal nya rin. I thought i couldn't moved on.
My second boyfriend, i thought was different. He's totally opposite of my first boyfriend. He is quiet, super genius, though he is not very showy because he's quite bashful. Sa sobrang genius nya lagi syang nasa library at boring na sya kausap. Until one day he broke up with me kasi daw he likes someone who loves to read book unlike me na hindi mahilig mag aral. Putik! Eh di sya na ang matalino.
The third one, i became more careful. I wanted someone who can accept me for who I am and who will be faithful to. me, so when my best friend courted me, i chose him. He was my friend so I am sure he will take care of me. But his family moved in California after we celebrated our second year anniversary. He said he never believes in long distance relationships so he ended things with me before he packed up. He was a coward. Well, maybe he doesn't love me that much. It sucks... It hurts.... I was redy to face every battle with him....but he left me with a damn reason.... I couldn't believe he can do that to me. I waited for his call, email....,text....but I waited for nothing. As in nothing....
I gave up. I guess True love does not really exist. It only happens in fairytales. And unfortunately I am not in a fairytale. I started to hate boys. When my dad left us for another girl, i told myself, not all men are like him. But i guess I am wrong. I think every man has the power to ruin every girls life :( they are monsters. Irresponsible......insensitive.....