16 parts Complete MatureWhen I think about the past I know that things happen for a reason, but sometimes these thing make you feel alone, worthless, like you are alone even if you are surrounded by people who say they will be there for you no matter what. Then when you reach for them you find that they are too far away to reach out for. You are left alone, stranded, drowning, without anyone wanting to get to you. So you grow used to being alone, not relying on anyone. Then someone comes by that you wish you could trust, but you can't. You hold onto the past and guard yourself when it isn't needed. You become a shadow of your past self. Smiling without feeling it becomes a pattern, soon the people who claim to know you no longer tell the difference between the mask and the true broken self. So when they try to get to you, they fail, unable to understand why, they leave. Saying that you are acting funny, not yourself. If only they knew the self that they see now is the broken part that remains left. That's who I am now. A shadow of who I used to be.
