HELP ME !! - message from me the author, not the actual title

Hi ! So i've been trying to get into writing and i don't have anyone to proofread my stuff. Could you please please please help me ? I've been trying with chatgpt (lmao) and it doesn't work very well. This is a super short story and any comments at all will really help !

Also, i thought i put enough foreshadowing but chatgpt thinks not so while you read please keep this in mind (also could you please tell me ways to incorporate this into it more?) : the main character is entranced slightly even before seeing the sun (reason for which he goes to watch the sunrise, no it's not just a random new routine), he is not meek, just being controlled by the sun, he does not break the control until the cup situation (which only diminishes the control slightly), it's the next event that completely breaks it