Fangs Are for Losers

I have never read or watched Twilight, but for some reason, this thing here is how I got out of my writer's block. Not trying to improve the story, just rewriting it my way inspired by all the top-tier memes and analysis videos I keep seeing on social media. Special thanks to wikipedia for telling me who everyone is and that one tiktokker who's writing a book about the Twilight phenomenon. (EDIT: Sarah Elizabeth Gallagher)

*Contains strong language, and probably violence later? IDK there's supposed to be vampires in it right