Comebacks and Insults

Reads 2,327,274
Votes 83,277
Parts 76
Time 9m

Reads 2,327,274
Votes 83,277
Parts 76
Time 9m

Hilarious Comebacks, Hilarious Insults and Burns!

If you want to know awesome comebacks and insults read this book. I promise you wont be disappointed.All Rights Reserved

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"So, let me get this straight," I looked at him weirdly, raising my hands slightly in exclamation. "You like me?!" I asked him in disbelief. "Like or like-like?" I really can't get my head to process his words at the moment. "Is it weird that I don't." He simply replied, his voice sounded calm but serious at the same time. "And for your question, I do. I do like-like you. Like, I really like you. To the point that you're the only thing that's on my mind everyday and I can't seem to get you off it." I was literally standing there like an idiot, slowing blinking my eyes in a slow pace, still can't believe what's actually happening in front of me. ______________________________ ( Partially Edited.) First Published: July 23, 2020 Finished: October 16, 2021

Am I straight? -» Phan by slightlyAwriter

- attempt #?? - Dan was an average little adolescent. Had a girlfriend, went to high school, basic stuff. But during an open house for his school, he finds someone more fitting to his eyes. p.s * my autocorrect back then was utter shit. my "the" turned into "lé" * p.s.s * also, if you dont read it because of the autocorrect problem, that is fine :) i wont be sad about it * p.s.s.s * i am a confident asshole *

I hate being the new girl! I always end up getting in trouble because of that one handsome asshole. Or two... And stop judging me, it's NEVER my fault! Well, almost never... Sometimes? #OkItsAlwaysMyFault #ShutUpAndRead ----------------------------------------------------------- /!\THIS BOOK CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE AND SEXUAL REFERENCES!/!\ THIS STORY BELONGS TO ME AND IS PURELY FICTIONAL.

A Whole 75 Pages of xD by SomeThingsOutThere

"You're trouble, you know that?" Fire captain Cameron McClain thinks I'm the meddlesome one, but he's the instigator. His rugged good looks and confident sense of humor should be illegal. Not to mention his dimples. They're partially to blame for why I leave this party and follow him back to his room. I knew we had chemistry, but from the second his lips meet mine, my body catches on fire. All it takes is one touch and the attraction between us combusts into an undeniable heat. One hot night. That's all we were meant to be. But now that I know how good we are together, how can I stay away?

Truth or Dare the Creepypasta's by BoneyardHorizons

You can leave comment or message me your Truth Or Dare for the Creepypasta people ^-^ ill do all and give you credit!!!

Comebacks/jokes/funny stuff by MendesIrishMuffin

This book is full of comebacks, jokes and just funny sayings and things like that.... If you take offence easily then do NOT read it Updates a few times a week mendesirishmuffin x

These are just some quotes! They vary from wise to hilarious to lovely to extremely accurate. So give it a read and laugh for hours! :D

Some wise asshole once told me that you can't stand right next to a fire and expect not to get burnt. James was a fire, an absolute fucking dumpster fire, but I figured it was safe to cover myself in gasoline and dryer lint and take a closer look. How could this not blow up in my face?

I watched the ashes fall of the lies you told, that I burned. I have fallen into the depth of your foolish love and God was I foolish. With every word of yours I've gained an insecurity, and it took me long enough to know that I fell and only I fell. It took me longer to know that my fairytale didn't end, it just started. And the pieces weren't falling apart, they were falling in place.

READ TO FIND OUT🤷🏾‍♂️😁

Losing someone is never easy. Especially if it's your best friend. Being in love with that someone though, makes it even more complicated. * Harry and Elizabeth grew up together. They were best friends, each other's happy place. But 7 years is a long time, a lot has changed... Harry is now living his dream, basking in the glory of his success. No matter how big he gets though, he could never forget where he came from. He could never forget those big blue eyes and the hearty laugh that he was once so fond of. And Elizabeth... well, she grew up. She's not the naive little girl she was all those years ago anymore, she sees the world differently now. She does her best every day, trying to get into line and have a normal life like most of us. Running away from your past and building up walls can only work for so long though, and a certain curly headed rockstar might just be able to crumble them all down in an instant. When their paths cross again, the darkness just becomes a tad bit brighter. They eventually fall back to same old habits, the memories clearer than ever and suddenly it all just makes perfect sense again. *** "Love is friendship that has caught fire." //MATURE AND EXPLICIT CONTENT//

I Wanna Be Yours (John Price X Reader) by Octernity

Price was content with the life he led, putting his work before himself for years had made him the great man that he was today. But you just had to make him question everything with your soft voice and pretty hair, didn't you? Or, Price has a crush and takes his sweet time trying to figure it all out whilst you suffer. A/N: Hi, hello, it's your girl. Yeah, so, all this chit chat over in America is scaring me when they're thinking about shutting down ao3 when that's literally one of my main platforms so I have regressed to my origins. As of when I'm moving this nothing has happened so I'm hoping this is just a preventative measure but yk 😩, I'm also going to put my other stuff on here so hopefully my years of work won't vanish into the wind. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this slow burn, I hope it makes you want throw yourself into a glass door out of frustration, go get your mans 💕

This book contains funny jokes that will make you laugh and smile!

disclaimer: i wrote in this when i was 13 years old, so it will be unfunny, cringy, and outlandish. that's just who i am baby. you have been warned.

At Their Very Best by lastnitewaskindablur

He lights his cigarette and inhales without looking at you once. Blowing out the fire in your hand, he looks to the audience and explains how he's in control of everything and everyone around him. That when he said the word "stop" he was able to bring the whole production to a halt.

The Phone Sex Worker by LovedAThousandLives

I didn't know why Julian was so different from my other clients. His voice was the first thing to catch my attention, followed closely by words so hot they lit a fire within me. Everything he said drew me to him like a moth to a flame; but that's the problem with fire. Someone was bound to get burnt. -- Completed as of 14/11/2017. --

"Holy shit, marry me." "Whoa, at least take me to dinner first." They didn't like each other, hated each other even, couldn't stand each other. Shit happened and all it could amount to was that it really be like that sometimes.

Hi! Hey!! Hello!!! It's me. I was wondering if after all these years you'll like to laugh your boredom out loud. This wattpad book is full of nothing but Rib-cracking jokes. Read and laugh out loud.

"I shouldn't do this." He spoke as if to himself. "Maybe if I didn't love you so much, I'd be able to resist." He muttered. I finally understood. I took his face in my hands. "It's not a crime to give me what I want every once in awhile." I breathed. He rolled his eyes. "I'll give you the world, Jamie....Just not my world." His voice was dangerously low. My eyes shut for a moment. "I know." I sighed. Once again his lips crushed mine. I forgot how to breath. For a moment, I forgot how to move. My entire body was frozen while a hot fire spread all over me. He was the hot fire.

You Like Me?! | ✓

"So, let me get this straight," I looked at him weirdly, raising my hands slightly in exclamation. "You like me?!" I asked him in disbelief. "Like or like-like?" I really can't get my head to process his words at the moment. "Is it weird that I don't." He simply replied, his voice sounded calm but serious at the same time. "And for your question, I do. I do like-like you. Like, I really like you. To the point that you're the only thing that's on my mind everyday and I can't seem to get you off it." I was literally standing there like an idiot, slowing blinking my eyes in a slow pace, still can't believe what's actually happening in front of me. ______________________________ ( Partially Edited.) First Published: July 23, 2020 Finished: October 16, 2021

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