I Walk Alone In Life

I'm not going to commit suicide. It's better to kill yourself on the inside slowly, and so damn painful you can't help but wince.
Divide the pain, in the inside is worse and now your just waiting for someone to notice the wincing pain someone who won't walk away when you say your fine someone who can see through the fake smile. But no one has. Now this is just sad. I am slowly Giving Up. But could someone's life change even the slightest,with one move, one problem, would it be for the better, or the worse? Or would I have already Given Up On Life?