rose tinted hours

jean kirschtein x fem!reader, college au

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There's a small comfort in knowing my own insignificance. Not like watching a video comparing the size of the Earth to other celestial bodies, or experiencing a sudden moment of clarity in a bumper-to-bumper style traffic jam on the highway.

Insignificant in the sense that nothing really matters and that's okay, it's always been okay, and there's really no point in thinking about it. Insignificant like a caterpillar that doesn't care if the sun's going to explode in a fucktillion years and focusses on the leaf it sits on. Insignificant like falling seamlessly into the life that I've been sewn into from the beginning, stitch by stitch, blind, chewing, chewing.

So why is it? Why is it when I attend university, when I listen to my lectures and do my homework and finish my shifts and eat my meal, why is it when I look into your eyes, I become something?

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ao3 tags:

ok here we go / Alternate Universe - College/University / Sickfic / Sick Character / Fluff / Kissing / Alternate Universe - Modern Setting / Texting / Vomiting / Not at the same time / Winter / i dont know how to make tea / mentions of bagged milk / slight angst? i guess? if you squint? / reiner texts like a boomer and im sorry / POV First Person / Present Tense / Friends to Lovers / One Shot Collection / Driving / Eventual Smut / Other Additional Tags to Be Added / Slow To Update