Where the Wind Whispers Her Name

Where the Wind Whispers Her Name

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    LECTURES 37
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    Chapitres 6
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WpMetadataNoticeDernière publication sam., août 17, 2024
"Hindi mo naman kailangang itago sa akin lahat eh" hinawakan ko ang pisngi nya at ngumiti "I know and saw everything" He looked at me with an apologetic eye. "Just please tell me the truth, I would fully understand it" My tears are starting to fall. "I love you and I want you to be happy" I took his cold hands and kissed them. "I want you to be honest with me love" He nodded in agreement. "Do you Love her?" He tightened his grip on my hands, enough for me to feel his trembling hands "I am so sorry but am afraid yes" I can see how sincere he is, the pity and the sorry were visible in his eyes. "I know love, I can see how you value her more than me. I fully understand you, so I wanted to take this opportunity to end everything here" I saw how his emotions changed from an apologetic one to something that resembles regret. As the words hung heavy in the air, a newfound silence covered the room, only our heavy breathing and the leaves rustling outside could be heard. Tears continued to cascade down my cheeks, each drop a testament to the heartache I bore. With a trembling voice, I again uttered a sentence I could not comprehend. "I understand" He reached out to wipe my tears, his touch a balm to my wounded and aching heart. "I never meant to hurt you nor make you cry" he murmured his voice laced with remorse. I can only nod and look directly at the floor, I don't want him to see me as fragile as this. "I know" I replied softly. In that moment We remained locked in silence. Two hearts - one was broken, and one was confused.
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YuanFen

What we have is just now. As long as she loves me. As long as she wants to be with me. As long as there is 'we'. I love her! But the rainbow is not just a blend of vibrant and bright colors. It doesn't even stay for a long period of time-- just enough for us to see and in a fleet of time is gone, leaving us wondering if it's real. A rainbow doesn't have black and white. It wasn't just like that. Same as love. Same as us. There were times that i want to give her up. Not because my love did fade, rather, my love is too much. Too much that letting her go is the only option left for her to choose me without hesitation, without guilt, freed of lies. I want her to grow, to weigh things as it is. I want her to make me feel that being with me is her choice. I want her to realize that i am hers and that she have to surrender herself to me as well. I want her to love me because that is the way she feels and not because it was the safest way. Being with her is paradise. It was a mixture of colored pastel. It was too vibrant to explain. But at a sudden twist of downs and ups, we are shaking. Loving her has become my weakness. The weakening thought of losing her when I fuck up is too much to run me insane. I'm overreacting perhaps. But being with her, means walking in a narrow-road of heaven. There's no security, no assurance. One wrong move, and I'll be slipping away. Just in the never ending pain of darkness, of solitude, of self-struggle. Loving her has become my addiction. I couldn't get enough of it. But so they say, what's too much can cause harm. Maybe I'm loving her too much that she finds it hard to breathe when i'm around. But yes, it is just a wishful thinking; things that I'll surely not going to say to her because i will never ever earn the courage to say so. We are just nothing but a 'fateful coincidence.'

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