Loving You The Second Time Around
- Reads 33
- Votes 1
- Parts 2
"Pain, that's how I define love. Bakit? Minahal ko naman silang lahat, pinagkatiwalaan, binigay ang lahat-lahat. Pero ang kinahantungan ng lahat ng yun? Puro sakit. Iisa ang kinahantungan namin ng mga nakakarelasyon ko. Third Party. Siguro hindi ako swerte sa pag-ibig. Siguro. Siguro." Yan ang palagi kong sinasbi bago sya dumating, bago ko sya papasukin sa buhay ko, at bago ko sya hayaang saktan ako.
Ako si Pheobe dela Rosa. Masarap daw ksama, masiyahin, maraming kaibigan, ideal daw girl ng mga lalaki at ang palaging ipinagpapalit. Nagising isang araw na biglang gusto ng labanan ang greatest fear nya sa buhay- ang magmahal uli.
Maniniwala ba ko sa ksabihang "Love is sweeter the second time around?" Hahayaan ko bang msaktan ako ulit? Ano kayang mangyayari sa second time na to?
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Sorry. Dipo ko kagalingan kasi ngayon lang naman ako nagsulat. :)
Hope you'll like it po. :)
Godbless! :)
All Rights Reserved
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"'Di ba sabi mo ay wala ka pang nagiging boyfriend?" pagkuway tanong nito. "Wala pa nga." "Pero nagka crush ka man lang ba?" "Hmm. Oo. Pero ayaw ko kasing maging emotionally attached kaya as much as possible ay pinapatay ko na agad ang feelings ko. Kasi. Ewan. Hindi ko alam kung paano i-explain." ang complicated talaga kapag hindi mo masabi 'yung nais mong sabihin no? 'Yung parang ikaw lang mismo ang nakakaintindi. "Parang hindi ka naniniwala?" "Parang gano'n na nga. I mean, alam mo naniniwala naman talaga ako, it's just that, syempre sa mga kagaya ko parang ang imposible lang ng idea na 'yan especially when if comes to same sex relationship. Siguro para sa iba ay nagwo-work pero sa'kin ay-you know, hopeless ako riyan. Kaya kapag may nakikita akong mga same sex couples ay naiinggit ako tapos ang ending mag i-imagine ako ng mga bagay na mag c-cause ng ikasasakit ko ng feelings ko kasi 'di ba marerealize mo na hindi naman ito sa'yo mangyayari. Minsan din ay na i-insecure na lang ako. Tsaka mostly rin kasi ay puro sex lang ang habol nila. Ayoko naman no'n." mahaba kong salaysay. "Kaya pala." nasabi niya na lang. "Siguro dahil ito na rin ang naging coping mechanism ko para maprotektahan ko ang feelings ko sa mga bagay na makasasakit sa akin emotionally. Unconciously ay nadedevelop ko na. Kaya ang ending na suppress na lang. Kaysa naman mag suffer ako sa mga sarili ko lang namang pag-iisip which is not healthy, why not i-suppress ko na lang diba?" "Pero hindi mo ba naisip na it takes time to wait for the perfect moment and it will be worth it?" "Alam mo. Sa totoo lang, palagi ko 'yang naiisip. Talagang na o-overshadow lang ng realization ko na imposibleng mangyari." "Pero, heto ka ngayon. Susubukan mo nang magmahal sa kabila ng beliefs mo." aniya. "Kasi may tiwala ako sa'yo." napangiti ako sa kanya kaya napangiti rin siya.
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