About You

love that hurts, the kind you know is wrong but can't walk away from. The silence, guilt, and the ache of staying when you should've left.

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Will I write your chapter???

I think not. It's too depressing.
The only thing that actually makes my heart bleed.
My headache.
Knees weak, arms heavy.
A gasp for air when I'm not drowning.
My heart skips beats - threatening to stop.
Tears pool and flow.
The world spins, and if I don't find my balance, I'll surely hit the ground.
Collapsing has become a ritual.
Nights long and hollow - yes, hollow like my heart.

But I have to.
It's all about you.
It all comes back to you.

I'm not a stupid person. But somehow, you always manage to make me one.
Why? Because I love you.
I told you - and I meant it.

I wasn't lying when I said I love you.

Before you break up with me, can I see you one more time?
Can I hug you one more time?
I don't trust this thing that beats inside my chest anymore.

Maybe I won't shatter into a million pieces again because this time, I expected you to break me.
Maybe I won't cry at all because I already prepared for the worst.
Maybe I won't ask you to stay, because again and again, you've proven we don't belong.

Or maybe I am stupid - for loving you insanely enough to keep letting you prove it.
I would stop if I could.
It's too hard, but I keep trying.

Just like the sun rises from the east and sets in the west, I love you - always.
Something that cannot be changed.
Just like the moon stays with the stars, the memory of you stays with my heart.

If only we could be strangers again.
I'd walk right past you and never get here - to this.

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