Zovem se sjećanje
  • Reads 699
  • Votes 150
  • Parts 11
  • Time 1h 32m
  • Reads 699
  • Votes 150
  • Parts 11
  • Time 1h 32m
Ongoing, First published Nov 14, 2024
Mature
Znao sam da će povratak u Birmingham otvoriti stare rane. Sjećanja na svađu s mojim ocem prije nego što sam zauvijek napustio naš obiteljski dom, suze moje majke, tihi prijezir moje starije sestre... Ali ono što nisam očekivao bila žudnja za povratkom u te dane. Dane kada je sve bilo jednostavnije iako je bilo komplicirano. Dane u kojima sam mogao vidjeti Zaru i maštati o tome da imam šansu kod nje. 
Dok hodam laganim korakom po poznatim, a opet nepoznatim ulicama, gotovo vidim mladog štrkljavog sebe, sa dugom kosom koja mi pada preko obrva i Zaru koja poskakuje pored mene u svojoj ljetnoj haljinici na bretele. 
Gdje li je sada ona? Da smo barem ostali u kontaktu možda... Odmahnem glavom. Ne postoji možda. Onaj stari Liam, nevini Liam možda je bio dostojan njezinog društva i to je sve. Ovaj današnji Liam nije dostojan ničega. 
Izgubio sam sebe na krive ljude, krive projekte, krive odluke. Anksioznost od koje patim kada ostanem sam može se ugasiti samo kad sam pod utjecajem nečega. 
I ne znam kuda će me život odvesti, ali povremeno se vartim u Birmingham i izdaleka promatram Božićni ručak u kući moje obitelji. Ja tamo nisam više dobrodošao. Nigdje nisam dobrodošao.
Što zbog tajni koje su priroda mog posla, a što zbog moje odvratne osobnosti kada sam pod utjecajem.
Možda bih mogao obaviti nekoliko poziva i pokušati pronaći Zaru? Možda samo da vidim kako je... Samo da znam da je dobro.

P.S. Upozorenje:
Ako ste osjetljivi na teme poput obiteljskog nasilja, uzimanja droge i alkohola, depresije, crnih misli i seksualnih radnji, ova priča nije namijenjena za vas. 18+
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