Lonely

As you grow older you get to realize that there is a difference between being depressed and alone. The aspect of point of being alone however is not isolation or the text book nor dictionary definition rather it is being around people but feel empty. Like you do not exist and that you don't matter.
The heart grows fonder and yearns for human connection but can't get any. Humans are social animals at least that is what we are told. What happens when we can't get this connections a sense of belonging ? The answers are endless, well the truth is subjective we can all agree that we deal with lonely two ways primarily one you can put yourself out there and other shitty ways to find your group, your pack.
The second one is what we all do some of us lie to ourselves that we do not. What is it? what do we do? Simple, when have been alone for a while your brain becomes your only companion it conjures a second personality one that tells you jokes and gives that one flashback that makes you cringe. Have you ever gone to sleep and have memories or near death scenarios just randomly visualized.
I have news for you ....You are not mad or have a mental illness. Its normal but then again too much of something is dangerous.