I'm not going to die for you
- Reads 11
- Votes 0
- Parts 2
Complete Tue, Apr 15, 20258m
Hi, fellow human being
It's a pleasure to experience your existence. This is me, listening to some advice I got from my therapist. And it's also me, sharing what I came up with. Why? I'm a bad writer, I can't write for the sake of it, so this is my way of writing for myself, till I learn how to actually do it just for myself.
Edited cover photo by Tsunami Green on Unsplash
All Rights Reserved
Join the largest storytelling communityGet personalized story recommendations, save your favourites to your library, and comment and vote to grow your community.
You may also like
333 Network
This isn't a story. It's about people with problems in life aka depression/anxiety/anything else you need help with. We're all hiding inside ourselves and don't know what to do. I hope to help... If you have problems, I highly recommend this. I'm open to any suggestions on what to talk about in this book and you can also pm me if you have a problem and need someone to talk to. I'm here if you need anything... A little disclaimer: This contains things like suicide, really brutal descriptions and some cuss words. If you are sensitive to any of those, I don't think you should read this. But if you have a problem with depression or suicide, I think you should. NO HATERS OR ANY BULLIES ALLOWED!!! YOUR ACCOUNT WILL GET DELETED IF YOU SAY RUDE OR MEAN THINGS TO PEOPLE AND ABOUT PEOPLE IN THIS BOOK!!!Complete
Diary
I want to write out my thoughts as honestly as possible and try not to lie like I always do. Maybe by being anonymous will make me stop being a liar. I think it's a bit late to say this after publishing for about a month but I should put a warning. ⚠️ WARNING: What I write about is depressing and suicidal and degrading. Do not read it if you're not mentally prepared.
Evolution
There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.Complete
Built for the Storm: A Journey Through a Mind That Won't Sit Still
Sometimes, I feel like I was designed not to live - but just to survive. My brain doesn't crave joy, meaning, or legacy - it just tries to prevent crisis. It calculates food, money, safety. It panics. It runs. It hides. And somehow... it keeps missing life. I've spent years trying to understand why my mind behaves this way. Why it imagines catastrophes while standing still. Why it avoids the simplest task. Why it overthinks even brushing teeth, but can ride a cycle for 100 km in the rain without blinking. One day, when I was still, completely still... with no task to distract me... this strange feeling overtook me. The thought that maybe - just maybe - I am not supposed to design my own purpose. I looked up. And I said, silently: "God... if You made me this way... if You crafted this restless, impulsive, chaos-driven machine of a brain... then You must know where I fit. Use me. Don't let me rot in guilt and survival. Don't let me just float. You know this universe in ways I never can. You know every corner of it. So You must know the one place where this exact wiring of mine can become meaningful." This wasn't surrender from pain. It was surrender from trying to control something I've clearly never understood. I don't need peace. I don't need success. I need to be used. Fully. For something only this kind of life, this kind of mind, could contribute. If I am a tool, let me build something. If I am a flame, let me burn where light is needed. But don't keep me in the dark asking, "Why me?" Maybe I wasn't built to ask. I was built to be assigned.Complete
The Words I couldn't Say
This is a place for me to put all the things I wish I said but I just couldn't. These are a way for me to "say" these things without actually saying them to the person I want to. I probably won't ever go back or read any of these because it's like revisiting a bad memory so don't expect much in terms of editing. Also I wouldn't consider this poetry but it is laid out that way. WARNING Talk of depression, suicide, anxiety, and self harm. Don't read if you don't like things like that and may get triggered. I don't mean to cause anyone problems of any sort, but these are the things I feel and can't help. Please keep negativity away as this is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. Thank you. Highest rankings: 99 in sadpoems Highest rankings: 118 in iwannadieComplete
Bitter Sweet Emotions
Just things I write well I'm not in a very good Place. I thought these aren't half bad. So why don't I share them with other people not only myself? So here we are I hope you like them. Also if some of them are Quotes or Poems you've seen before feel free to tell me, because I never looked anything up just wrote what came to mind. So maybe I wrote a Quote, that has already been thought of, and of course Thank you for even clicking on this worthless, trashy, and utterly pointless book... Side note it gets better at the end of this book. The beginning is 6th grade me (11-12 year old me) so it's pretty fucking terrible, but who gives a fuck anyway? Not Me!Complete
WHEN THE RAIN FORGOT TO FALL
I wrote this because I needed to survive it. Because there are some feelings too big for silence. Some heartbreaks too heavy to carry alone. This isn't fiction. This is my heart, broken open and rearranged into verse. "I saw you standing where the sidewalk curves, and suddenly my chest knew different words." - That's how it started. A glance. A stranger. A feeling I couldn't ignore. "You said we needed to talk. Those five words, I knew. I already knew." - And that's how it ended. Not with fire. With silence. I won't tell you that time heals all wounds. I won't say everything happens for a reason. I won't pretend heartbreak makes you stronger. But I will show you that: You can survive what you think will destroy you. You can break and still become beautiful. You can love someone and lose them and still be whole. You can be your own happy ending. I wrote these poems with tears on my face. I wrote them on good days when I forgot to hurt. Every word is something I actually felt. Every line is a moment I actually lived. "You are not broken. You are breaking open. And that's where the light gets in." - That's what this taught me. That's what I hope it gives you, the comfort of knowing you're not alone.Complete
Shit Happens
This is for anyone that can't put there thoughts and feelings into words. Whether it be at your best, worst, most beautiful, or most tragic times. These poems will remind you of them. Or so I hope. Because I mean Shit Happens. What you should expect from this book: I am not trying to make excuses for why I push so many people away, I am not trying to make excuses for my actions, I don't get excuses, not anymore, No, I am merely providing explanations, If you don't like them, If you don't except them, If you just don't care, Then that's on you, Because I will not answer the question why anymore, I will bare my soul to you in the folds of these pages, Not saying a word, These are my explanations, These are me, Do with them as you will. And I mean, just don't be an asshole. Thanks. Kisses <3Complete
This isn't a story. It's about people with problems in life aka depression/anxiety/anything else you need help with. We're all hiding inside ourselves and don't know what to do. I hope to help... If you have problems, I highly recommend this. I'm open to any suggestions on what to talk about in this book and you can also pm me if you have a problem and need someone to talk to. I'm here if you need anything... A little disclaimer: This contains things like suicide, really brutal descriptions and some cuss words. If you are sensitive to any of those, I don't think you should read this. But if you have a problem with depression or suicide, I think you should. NO HATERS OR ANY BULLIES ALLOWED!!! YOUR ACCOUNT WILL GET DELETED IF YOU SAY RUDE OR MEAN THINGS TO PEOPLE AND ABOUT PEOPLE IN THIS BOOK!!!
More detailsContent Guidelines