Why Not Me? (Kintsugi #01)

Am I a yearner or a martyr?

I think I'm in between. I've been loving someone who wants me near, yet also wants me at the distance. I was fine, at least I told myself that it's fine.

I also didn't mind the pain. I just wanted to love her. Regardless if she loves me back or not. I'm just grateful to be by her side, and that she allows me to be by her side even for a short time.

She constantly ask me why. My friends also ask me why. Funny, I also ask myself that question.

I don't know. There's no possible reason in this world. The world won't be able to justify.

She deserves everything. Every love, and all the good things.

She's been guarding herself, with walls higher than the castle she's in. Still, I knew that I didn't need to climb the walls she built for herself, instead I had the urge to stand by the gates and guard her as well. Guard her until she's finally ready to open the gates---if that day will ever come.