Through my eyes

7 years in a toxic relationship doesn't just break your heart, it reshapes you in ways you never asked for. It's not just the ending that hurts, it's the years you spent losing little pieces of yourself trying to make it work, trying to be enough, trying to love someone who didn't love you first.

It's the emotional whiplash of being loved one moment and torn down the next. The constant anxiety walking on eggshells, second-guessing your worth, trying to anticipate moods so you wouldn't be the next target. You start to believe the voice in your head that sounds a lot like his: *you're too much*, *you're not enough*, *you're lucky anyone puts up with you at all.*

And when it finally ends when you finally leave or they finally go it should feel like freedom. But it doesn't. Not at first. It feels like a storm passed through your body and left everything raw. You're not celebrating. You're grieving. Grieving the years lost, the self worth chipped away, the dreams you buried just to keep peace.
I am finally ready to come out. In this book is my old love life, this personally represents a healing/healed spot for me but every letter typed in this book with with blood sweat and tears along with prayers, if you find this book maybe you can relate or just listen to my story & hear me.
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Side note: this book holds variety of my soul & emotions a lot of it is explained in a emotional & spirit/MENTAL way (lots of emotional, trauma this book will talk about a lot of mental health) This is just what pain I went through and I wanted to share my pain and yet I just want it be believed and seen. I just want to be heard. So this is "through my eyes". (I'm sorry if my story sounds so dramatic or dumb, but this was a way for me to vent as well when I had no one)