She died before I ever knew her.
And now I can't stop loving her.
Fae Caulder was the kind of girl who slipped through the cracks-quiet, odd, invisible. When she takes her own life, her name echoes through the halls of Pinehollow High, but nobody really knew her. Nobody cared. Not until she was gone.
Except now, Porsha Wells can't stop thinking about her.
What starts as guilt spirals into obsession, grief, and something more tender-something terrifying. As Porsha uncovers pieces of the girl Fae used to be-through forgotten poems, journal entries, and fading memories-she finds herself falling in love with a ghost, and mourning a relationship that never had the chance to begin.
This is not a love story.
It's the aftermath.
Content Warning:
Posthumous deals with themes of suicide, depression, isolation, and grief. It contains emotionally heavy material, including depictions of mental illness and mourning. Please read with care and take breaks if needed. You are never alone.
This is a story about grief. About a girl who dies, and another girl who begins to love her far too late. It's heavy. It aches. And it's not always kind. But I wrote it with care, and I hope you read it that way too.
If you're struggling, please know: you are not alone. You are not too much. You are not invisible.
There are people-real ones-who want you to stay.
spencer,
i'll remember how i'd loved you.
even after i saw the hate behind your sweet eyes and messy statistics.
even after i heard casually cruel words leave the same sugary lips that you used to plant soft kisses on my cheeks.
even after i saw you kill right in front of me.
the loss of your presence would still hurt the same. it probably wouldn't even matter what you did or didn't do because at night, i would still be crying into my pillow about everything that happened to you regardless.
that's another thing that hurts so bad about this all.
your loss.
it's obvious, i know that.
but i feel so alone.
and you're actually gone this time.