Funny quotes, jokes, and pick-up lines
  • Reads 33,496
  • Votes 1,140
  • Parts 50
  • Time <5 mins
  • Reads 33,496
  • Votes 1,140
  • Parts 50
  • Time <5 mins
Complete, First published May 17, 2015
Rules to Reading:
1. None of these are mine.
2. I don't mean to offend anyone; these are just quotes I find and put down.
3. Some may be really funny and some may not, but please don't put hate comments.
4. Sorry if you've used these in Wattpad already, I look these up from online and not other Wattpad joke books.
5. Enjoy! Vote, comment on your favorites, share!
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His Submissive Dancer by lavender2024
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" Be a good little girl and tell me why your getting punished?" he said in my ear dangerously low, which meant I really fucked up. " I'm getting punished because I disrespected you, didn't take care of myself, created a scene, lied to you, cursed a lot, and I ran away from you." I said with tears brimming my eyes, I was scared because usually when I break a rule he gets very strict and the punishment is horrible and wicked and I just disobeyed half of his rules. " I almost forgot you lied to me, thank you for reminding me darling." he spoke with such venom that it scared the living shit out of me. I started to cry and we haven't even begun. ----------------------------------------------------- was a closed package, she never opened up to anyone, and she is a scared of her past. She has many issues and problems that she keeps to herself, which to fight them she dances. Dancing day and night, and growing strong for nationals. The only people that know those problems are her two friends, that will tell no one. She got accepted to work at a BDSM club where her friend works, and she just got accepted to her dream collage. Will her past become a problem with collage, a job, and dance? Will she find someone? Or is she going to go down the spiral...again. Alex is a strict and hard dom, and all of his submissive's have left him in less then a year because of how scary and hard he can be. Even though Alex is a hard and strict dom, he is a soft-hearted person that wants nothing but the right person. He lives alone but gets daily visits by his family, they come simply uninvited. His brother owns a BDSM club that one day Alex hopes to find a girl who would be his little submissive.
20 tracks for a beautiful mind by FareehaAurooz
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self help book for everyone out there..... 1)cultivating positive thoughts Your thoughts have a huge impacts on your well being. If you want to be in happy mood then you have to see everything from a positive perspective ,in order to find the true happiness in whatever you do. There are so many self care help tips to evolve your Personality,in life you will face a lot of tough situation, tangled ways of life and many more but your good mind set or mentality could be very useful for you to adapt a new skills and personality development. If you allow your mind to stay out from negativity ,or to put all of your energy in doing something better then, That will add some colour to your life.worrying will only maximise the mess of your mind .And truely i have felt that the patience is one of the most important quality in every human being. you can't be happy if you can't bear it with patience when something unusual happens to you. There are many ways through which we can actually developed a positve mind set, do you want to change for better? Let's open these chapters to add some positive vibes in your mood and to uplift , *be your own sunshine. *analyse people around you . *believe in the beauty of having patience . *have clear visions . *be bold enough to raise your voice. and wise enough to shut it too(act according to situation) . *who you are you know this, don't waste your energy in proving yourself. Rather invest your time in evolving your career or dreams. *your passion will always triggers your Actions . *choose wisely whom with you Wanna share your time . *don't be dependent on another person for your Happiness . *your happiness is a your responsibility. *Be kind to others will make you a good human . *your life is already very good be thankful . *take charge of yourself . *be accountable . *be responsible for your own decisions . *don't blame . *be wise .
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Rib-cracking Jokes

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Hi! Hey!! Hello!!! It's me. I was wondering if after all these years you'll like to laugh your boredom out loud. This wattpad book is full of nothing but Rib-cracking jokes. Read and laugh out loud.